Classless Ascension
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chapter-380-30041322
Two buddies were happily reveling in the suffering of the orc. He was now frowning heavily in front of a blue/red shit monkey:
"You have to pick one. Each is hard to resist in its own way, and there is no—" The monkey began to explain, only to suddenly freeze.
The orc had just grabbed both and stuffed them in his mouth!
"A-are you crazy?!" The monkey stared with its eyes bulging
"An orc doesn't cower in the face of danger! If I won't die anyway, what do I have to fear! I can endure any suffering!" He bellowed heroically.But a second later, the pills took effect as his eyes turned glazed and a grimace bloomed on his face. He saw Heaven and Hell at once, and it was so damn torturous! He disappeared from the Floor only to reappear next to his master.
"Welcome back. That sure was a quick death." Josh commented.
"M-master?!" His troubled eyes were slowly regaining lucidity.
Then he checked his surroundings, finally realizing that had happened. His gaze turned so steady as he grinned. "Is this how it feels to die? It's not that scary."
Then he was already going back to the mission to get another ticket!
[He's surprisingly resilient….]
"Is he?"[Oh yeah, most tremble for a while after such an experience.]
[Well, not you, but most find it quite traumatizing.]
[I wonder what gives him so much drive…]
"I'd say orc pride and a few screws loose, haha." Josh chuckled as he kept munching on his popcorn.
It turned out he was right. Lots of orc pride!
Be sensible and just eat one deadly colorful shit? No way! He chose to keep pushing, surviving a little longer every time. After all, most of this exercise was mental.
The orc died so many times that Josh lost count. But he didn't even seem to realize the many losses as he kept going. All until he finally succeeded.
"Hahaha! This is the power of an orc!" He thundered crazily.
[He sure is special…]
[He reminds me a bit of you minus the OP part…]
"What?! I'm obviously way more handsome! Take it back right now!" Josh playfully replied.
[Congratulations! Acquired Shameless Title!]
"Now you're mimicking a regular Tower?!"
[It's called acting!]
[Your students do it a lot.]
[They pretend to die when they want to exit.]
"Wait…they're just pretending to die? Like without any enemy?"
[Yep. I've even seen them choke on their own saliva!]
"…."
Then the orc reached the typewriter monkey office Floor. One would have expected an orc to have trouble with that, right?
The big burly fellow was so tall that he barely fit on his tiny office chair. It was creaking, struggling to hold his weight. His fingers were large enough that hitting only one key at a time was a challenge.
But even then, the NPCs didn't seem to notice in the slightest. They just went: "Green monkey, you better type like your life depends on it!"
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Thus he began typing, incredibly irked at first. What kind of torture was this?! He glared at the clock as if a mortal enemy! As for the mental effect? He was too pissed to notice it.
He didn't seem like he was going to make it. After all, writing so much with close to no rest was inorcish!
But then he suddenly reached enlightenment. Who knows why or how, but his typing pace suddenly increased. It went faster and faster. He kept typing and typing relentlessly.
He had cracked the code: one has to enjoy what they write.
Then it was break time. All the other monkeys slumped on their chair to sleep. But they freaking couldn't! The sound of a loud typewriter echoed in the room.
— Click! Clack! Click! Clack! —
"Y-you! Green monkey, why are you still typing?!" They asked, confused.
But the orc didn't even bother to reply as he kept typing in a trance. There was no way that he was ever stopping!
"Green monkey?!"
"Please stop already!"
The other typing monkey shouted desperately. They were so tired! The old monkey next to him slowly approached to tap his shoulder and bring him back to his senses.
But then he froze. What the hell was this?! There was way more than what he needed to type! There were pages and pages! There were so many of them that it didn't make sense! When had he typed that?!
But that wasn't all. Somehow, all letters seemed to form….words?! He gasped in shock. There were no superfluous letters at all! All of them formed complete words! For these typing monkeys, this was an accomplishment.
— Click! Clack! Click! Clack! —
It kept raging on as the other monkeys complained endlessly.
"Old monkey, make him stop!"
"If we don't sleep, we'll die!"
"Newbie, just rest! You can type later!"
But not only was the green monkey not answering their pleas, but the old monkey was now turning a deaf ear too.
He was way too busy reading what the orc had been typing, his gaze glued to the pages. He went through them like an alcoholic through beers! He couldn't get enough!
The more he read and the more heated he got. It was as if he was suddenly turning into a young spring monkey all of a sudden! The drive and will to live that he had lost years ago were coming back!
But then he reached the end.
"Where's the rest?!" He cried out.
Then the old monkey's gaze landed on the typewriter. He would read as the page came out! He forced himself to stand still, even with how much he was shaking in excitement, and he kept reading!
The others noticed his peculiar state.
"Old monkey?!"
"What's wrong with him?!"
"He started reading, and he became like that!"
A tired monkey slowly approached the two amidst the typing sound. But as he lay his eyes on the first page of the manuscript, he also froze.
"The Orc Manifesto— Inspired by Josh MF Malum." He softly murmured the title as he began reading and became captivated by it too.
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This was the start of it all!
— Click! Clack! Click! Clack! —
+ 1 Energized Monkey!
— Click! Clack! Click! Clack! —
+ 2 Energized Monkey!
— Click! Clack! Click! Clack! —
+ 4 Energized Monkey!
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
Before long, there was an army of monkeys crowding around the busy orc.
They were all entranced, lowly mumbling as they kept reading. So many were looking at the orc's fingers as they flew across the typewriter. It was so damn wonderful!
The Orc Manifesto was all about orc pride.
It was all about having the strength to stand up for one's beliefs and to have pride. It didn't mean to be arrogant either, but to know one's limit, always push them, and believe in oneself!
It was freaking wonderful!
But an irritated monkey soon crashed the party:
"What the heck are you stupid monkeys doing?! It's time to work! Disperse! Go back to your stations!" The supervisor shouted at them.
Two hours had already passed?!
But even as they heard the angry monkey, they couldn't take their eyes away from the typewriter. These words were so damn exciting!
The supervisor saw the object of their interest.
"Tch— Green monkey, stop for a second and explain yourself, or I'll bash your brains in!" The supervisor hated to be ignored. It made him feel like a small chimp!
The orc didn't even acknowledge his existence. He hadn't even realized what was happening. The supervisor couldn't tolerate this anymore.
"Screw you! Freaking die!" He powerfully struck!
One of the reading monkeys saw this happen with horror in his eyes. He was sneak attacking the green monkey! If the green monkey died, he wouldn't be able to keep writing, and they wouldn't read the rest. Oh no!
The monkey's body moved by itself. He threw himself straight unto the mighty fist, making it deviate at the cost of his ribs shattering. He lay weakly on the floor as he threw up blood.
The monkeys had been reading The Orc Manifesto, and they knew about orc pride.
"Y-you!"
"You dare attack us?!"
"Brothers, show him your orc pride!"
That's when the once overworked and weak monkeys all jumped at the supervisor raining blows on him. He cried in pain but to no avail:
"What the— ARGG!"
"Stop hitting— ARGGG!"
"Stop it! I'll die at this rate!— ARGGG!"
The supervisor monkey was soon reduced to a crying broken mess trying to protect its vital. But this was only the beginning.
"Brothers, this guy tried to destroy the holy text!"
"Obliterate him! Show no mercy! Kill!!!"
"Make sure his filthy blood doesn't stain the pages!"
A few instants later, the supervisor perished. His corpse was just thrown aside, no one caring much about it.
But then the monkeys realized something:
"Guys, this bastard isn't alone."
"Right, there are other higher-ups!"
"Will they try to get rid of the holy text too?!"
They looked panicked as they glanced at one another. They couldn't allow this to happen! Wait, the Orc Manifesto said something about evil beings, right?
In the others' eyes, they saw the same resolve.
It was time for a freaking crusade…
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Josh and AT watched the events unfold.
The orc kept typing, seemingly unaware of the world around him and the revolution happening. The workers were going against their patrons.
Usually, a revolution would have been easily snuffed out. The defense system would have shot a few powerful lasers and killed a few belligerent monkeys. Then they would have felt profound fear and given up.
But this time was different. Even as more and more monkeys perished, they kept the assault going. Blood stained their fur, and their corpses were consumed by the inferno breaking out in the office.
There were fumes, smoke, and flames as tall as walls. The fire fed on all the writing supplies and grew stronger. It was the freaking apocalypse! Soon all the worker monkeys were dead— besides the orc still typing.
But did this matter? It was a Pyrrhic victory for the monkey boss. The commotion had been destructive enough to force the business to shut down.
This was the end of the Monkey Typing Company…
[Wow. No wonder it reads inspired by Josh Malum…]
"What do you mean?! I'm the most peaceful guy ever!" Josh protested.
[Didn't you annihilate a civilization in the Dog-War Floor?]
"What?! No! I just freed a poor dinosaur. They died by themselves!" Josh shrugged.
[I definitely see a few of your life philosophies in there. It even includes staying true to oneself and having to courage to slay gods…]
"Eh….Anyway, is this a pass or a fail?" Josh asked, confused.
[Even I am not sure how to grade this…]
The two glanced at the orc, who was still typing, even as the place was on fire. Deeming it a pass, AT sent him to the next Floor in a flash of purple.
That's when the desperate orc screams filled the Floor.
"Nooo! I wasn't done writing my Manifesto!" He cried out, falling on his knees in the desert sand.
[….]
"….."
Not everyone handled success the same it seemed….