Demon Immortal
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chapter-276
Emotions in itself are a complicated minefield.
Duncan didn't have much experience with dealing with them. He was blunt man by nature. He didn't have the nuance or the wide range of emotions. So, he didn't have much exposure when coming to dealing with them.
However he understood base emotions like anger, frustration, happiness, relief, sadness and so on. So, the first step he tried to do when trying to alter the emotion associated with his experience was to try to attach another emotion to it and let it dominate the despondency that was being magnified severalfold.
Duncan tried to work with positive emotions like happiness and joy first. However, the inherent emotion of the memory was that of a negative light. He had been feeling pretty down and out during those times. That's why he tried to forget them by drowning them in wine. Trying to alter such a base component was not possible for him at this time.
So, Duncan had to settle for other negative emotions that could aid him in combatting the despondency that was being magnified. The first emotion that came to Duncan's mind was anger. Anger was something he was very familiar with. So, Duncan felt that he could attach that emotion to the memories that brought forth despondence and let it dominate the original emotion of the memory.Duncan first picked the memory where he was feeling down and out because of not having any support when he was working as a spirit stone miner. He picked it because most of the memories attached to that period were filled with despair and a kind of numb feeling to the world.
He had gotten out of it somehow in the later days, but those early days when he was just a little teenager who was trying to survive this world as an orphan were too many to count. And these memories were the ones that were majorly affected by this region.
So, Duncan began to try to add anger to those memories. He thought of how helpless he had been at that time and how no one had extended a helping hand. Apart from Granny Jiao, no one had cared for him at that time. Duncan used that feeling of being ignored by the world to nurture the anger in his heart.
He began to slowly flame that emotion of being angry due to negligence. Miraculously, it seemed to work too well. Duncan was taken aback a little bit, but he nevertheless continued the process.
He tried to attach the anger that was inherent in him to these emotions. Slowly, the anger began to dominate his mind and he started moving away from the despondency induced by the environment here.
Just thinking back on how no one had helped him during that time brought forth a flame of rage that seemed to be burning bright in his heart after some time. He felt unnecessary anger towards the world in general. He looked down on those people who had left him to muddle along without helping him.
He didn't care about why they needed to help or what they could have helped with. All he knew was that no one helped him when he had struggled as a mortal. He had worked like a slave under the tyranny of cultivators who supervised that spirit mine.He had been yelled at, shoved around and even sometimes slapped in the head for being too weak and too slow to complete the tasks. These weren't stuff he made up either. They were always there. It had actually happened to him when he was just starting out in the spirit mines.
Until now, Duncan hadn't thought about these things much. He had simply shrugged them away. But, when the emotion of anger was attached to it, these memories were shed in a new light.
All he could see was how badly he was treated then.
Duncan wanted to do something about it. At that time, he didn't have any cultivation to speak of. So, he had to lay low and act meek. But now, his cultivation far surpassed those cultivators. He wanted to give back a severalfold of what treatment he had received at that time.
But, there was a problem with that sentiment.
All those men were dead or gone after the destruction of his village. He didn't know where they lived currently. This made it impossible for him to enact his revenge on them. And this made Duncan angry as well.
The embers he had fanned so far started burning bright with a mad desire to consume everything. The rage that came upon Duncan when he realized that he couldn't take revenge for his treatment made him swear angrily.
Duncan hated the people who destroyed his village. He loathed them like no other in this world. He decided to nurse this hatred slowly and find those people one day and take revenge. Furthermore, they had killed Granny Jiao, the only person who cared for him to a certain extent.
Duncan felt that Granny Jiao was very precious to him. She was the only one who had even cared about an orphan like him. These people have killed her as well. Not only did they take away his chance for revenge, leading him to not know where the cultivators who were present were, but they also took away the only soul to show him kindness.
Duncan felt his rage burn just thinking about these people. Even though his heart realized that he wouldn't be able to do anything to these people with his current strength, the desire still became rooted in his heart more firmer than ever at this moment.
Like this, every despondent moment he experienced flashed through Duncan's mind. In a bid to combat the magnified emotions due to the environment, Duncan constantly attached anger and rage to those memories.
What Duncan didn't know was that these artificial altering of the emotions he experienced and attaching anger and rage to his memories were also having a profound effect on Duncan's psyche at this moment. He was unaware of the potential problems this altered psyche could bring to him.
Before entering this region and experiencing the magnified emotions, Duncan was pretty level-headed. He understood the simple truths of the world due to his experience as a mortal for eighteen years and had come to terms with that.
However, he had forcefully altered the emotions attached to those memories in a bid to combat the current crisis. While it did help Duncan to overcome the current problems he faced, he was unaware of the potential detrimental effects of it as well.
Memories are the building blocks of a person's psyche. They and the emotions that were attached to them will determine how a person will react to a certain situation that occurs currently.
They basically determine a person's personality in loose terms.
There is a difference between a person who experiences a loss and gets dejected and a person who experiences a loss and still moves forward. The emotions and how one processes these events will determine the basic personality of a person.
Duncan had a pretty healthy personality until this moment. Sure, he was a bit cautious, but he wasn't a coward. Sure, he was a bit blunt, but that didn't mean he didn't understand nuances. His upbringing had shaped him up to be so.
But, right now, Duncan had altered one of the building blocks of his upbringing.
And this naturally had a profound effect on him as well. It is just that, Duncan wasn't aware of what he was becoming currently. Duncan's mind was solely concentrated on combating the despondency that he was unwittingly walking a slippery slope.
Anger in small doses is good. Anger in appropriate places is even important to possess. Anger in excess might only bring unwanted and unsolicited trouble to a person's door.
Anger and rage were termed as negative emotions for a reason. They are like a fire that devours the very person who thrives on it. They will twist making them become short-tempered. They will make them seek out violence as an outlet. They will make a person cruel and sadistic. And there are several more detrimental effects.
That is why balance among emotions is required.
Duncan, in his ignorance, had made himself a ball of anger. Anger at everything and towards everything. This altered the basic personality that he had cultivated so far. It made him impulsive and short-tempered.
Duncan, at this stage, was nothing but a ball of anger deep in his heart. Even he didn't know what word would set him off at this point. While the anger fueled him currently, and made him combat the despondency induced by the surroundings, it also left behind several dangerous traps for him to fall into.
Duncan, who was unaware of these hidden dangers, only rejoiced at the moment as he felt the despondency in his soul and the lethargy in his body were being neutralized. Due to his constant anger-induced state, Duncan's eyes started turning red.
While Duncan became far more active in this state and his body started cooperating more with him due to the inherent anger stemming from his heart, it also had some adverse effects on his soul and body.
Nevertheless, Duncan felt that he had succeeded in his endeavor. He could already feel that his control over his body had increased and his mind had cleared up a bit. Looking at the surroundings that almost caused him death, Duncan felt rage burn in his heart. He wanted nothing to do with this damned place.
He didn't know what caused this region to become so cursed. His cultivation hadn't been raised to such an extent yet. He couldn't perceive the world in such depth yet. This impotence on his part only angered him further.
He knew he wouldn't be able to pursue the root cause behind this phenomenon. His lack of cultivation made sure of it. He still didn't understand how such a region could exist in the first place. But, Duncan vowed in his heart that he would return to this place once again when his cultivation was high enough and solve this riddle.
Taking one last look at the surroundings, Duncan began trekking across the region with increased vigor. He now had a new purpose in his heart and this one suited him more than the passive one he had earlier.
Duncan smiled brightly as he made his way unaware that the region had already damaged his psyche to a great extent.