Don’t Concern Yourself With That Book
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chapter-325-30041322
Chapter 325
Translator: yun
The ministers quickly turned back around. The preparations would begin in earnest the next day. In fact, it was currently still the middle of the night and the moon was still hanging high in the sky. The people who had gathered in a hurry did not have the luxury of stretching and returning to sleep.
“Disperse, everyone.”
As the ministers dispersed, I too left with the rest of my aides. Rebecca had hesitated momentarily but the moment she saw me, she withdrew as well.“Why didn’t you leave too, Abel?”
Only Abel and I were left in the empty space. Even the winds were silent tonight as if it had gone to sleep too.
“I have something to tell you, your Majesty.”
“What is it?”
A scroll fell out of his hand and into my lap, fluttering in the wind. Upon closer inspection, the parchment had a lot of dirt caked upon it.
“I had been asked a personal favour. I received this scroll from a knight called ‘Ray’.”
“What?”“It’s not an official document which is why I’m only passing it to you after all the ministers have left.”
My hands were trembling. The letter sitting on my knees was shaking vigorously.
“Before we arrived at the battlefield, there was a strategist that dealt with the enemy forces using mysterious schemes.”
“I know.”
I was already notified of that in the letter sent by the Head Templar of Diana, the general guarding the west. She did not know who he was but they managed to barely get by because of the capable talent’s strategies.
“You seem to already be aware, Your Majesty.”
“…..”
“This letter had been written by him.”
I slowly flipped the letter over. My cheeks tremble upon the sight of the familiar handwriting. However, I tried to suppress my tremors before staring at Abel.
“You look lonely.”
“I didn’t want to fall apart.”
“If I thought the girl I met at the academy was dry, the woman I see before me now must be someone else.”
Well.
“That letter was his last message. The knight that handed me the letter…. It’s hard to say if he would live for much longer.”
I had no clue what I looked like or what expression I had on my face.
“That man, I don’t know what I should say. The 7th Prince… A brother whose face I have never seen.”
Abel continued albeit hesitatingly.
“Leave.”
The lights had all gone out. I was hoping the thick shadows would swallow me whole.
“I would like to be alone.”
Abel seemed to want to speak more but soon backed away with a look of resignation. He kicked off the ground before quickly disappearing.
Alone in the room, I tapped on the parchment.
“Dane…”
It’s his last, he said that this was his last. I knew what that meant. But I couldn’t ask Abel.
“It can’t be? Hm? Right?”
It felt like I would fall apart if I admitted it. If I had opened this letter in front of him, I thought everything would have fallen apart.
“L-Let’s, Let’s stay calm…”
I had no idea what it was going to say. But I couldn’t leave it closed forever, could I? Forcing myself, I read the letter.
But I could no longer stand it and bolted from reality. I ran like a deer that had been caught in the headlights. Someone seemed to have recognised me and was now chasing after me but a purple butterfly I summoned chased them away.
“No. No. No.”
I ran without knowing where I wanted to go or where I was headed before stopping.
I arrived at an empty palace. The palace was still for it held no soul as its roof was dyed red by the moonlight. Ever since I ascended the throne and moved into my new residence, the now empty Terena Palace welcomed the one who used to be its mistress. It was only after confirming that there was no one around did I sit down.
“Ah… Argh… Dane..”
Dane’s letter documented his journey to the west, what he had done thus far and what he planned to do in the future. His neat handwriting carried the scent of the man who prepared for the end.
[My dearest Ashley, my eternal wish is for you to never receive this letter. If you’re reading this… this means I can no longer speak to you.]
Drip. Tears welled up in my eyes. It was only here that I could act like a child. A child who was not ashamed of crying loudly. Crying about how I no longer had older brothers who would nag at me anymore, older brothers who would hug me kindly anymore. But they remained within me.
I heard a crackle from a distance. I thought it was an echo of how my world was crumbling apart. Teras continued to blur my vision.
I didn’t know how to release everything clogged up inside me so I struck my chest in confusion.
–You were always crying.
I raised my head with a start. Shaking my head, I thought I had been mistaken. Blankly, I headed to the garden with tears still hanging from the tip of my chin. On the other side, was a man I never thought I would see here.
“Hernan?”
I thought I had been mistaken. But his body looked see-through and was glowing faintly.
“Why are you here?”
He smiled faintly before turning his head from side to side.
–I don’t know either. Why I’m here.
He looked down at his hands. Immediately, Hernan raised his head and smiled.
–Maybe because you’re my Companion, Your Majesty… Is this what you would call a miracle?”
His words did not answer my question but that didn’t matter.
“Her-Hernan… You… Why…”
Whether he was a ghost or not, the joy I felt from seeing him again became the catalyst for the tears which had stopped momentarily to flow again.
–Y-Your Majesty!
Perplexed, he strode towards me.
–Please don’t cry.
His head went straight through my face. Hernan looked puzzled as if he had not expected that to happen before soon smiling bitterly.
–I cannot wipe them off anymore.
“…..”
–I’m sorry.
He whined like a puppy even though there was nothing for him to be sorry about. I let out a dejected laugh.
“What are you doing? There’s nothing for you to be sorry about.”
–B-But still…
“Hernan.”
—Yes.
“Why…”
I quickly stopped. Why did he go? Why did he go when he knew he was going to die? Why did he look like this now? Why! But the words building up within me never became sentences.
“Why do you say that I’m always crying?”
Because I already knew the answer. I was the one who sentenced him to death.
“I don’t recall crying in front of you that many times.”
Just then, I recalled the sight of Kaltanias in that cavity.
“First, it was my maid, then an attendant. And then, my nanny… I have lost my flesh and blood, lost the loyal men I cherished.”
Gradually, she lost many things. Her family, her blood, her loyal men…
Perhaps she had lost those who loved her as well.
“Fate is cruel. I can’t believe I have to lose something to make my wish come true.”
It was said that fate would repeat once more, thousands of years from then, in the age of destruction. Who was she referring to when she mentioned the final emperor? I had taken the crown from Castor to rise to my current position. In any case, I was the current emperor. That meant I would be losing everything to fate.
“Hernan.”
-… Yes.
Hernan reached out to me once more. As he looked at his hands that passed through my cheeks, his face contorted as though he wanted to cry.
–Please don’t cry.
“Look. I’m not crying now.”
–How can you say you’re not crying just because you don’t have tears in your eyes?”
A voice fuelled by his emotions poured out his true feelings.
–You were always crying whenever I saw you.
I thought he was going to reach out again but he gave up. Since it was just going to pass through me again.
“Is that why you wanted to see me smile? Why you said you would do anything you could if I could just smile?”
–Yes.
“How foolish you were.”
–It’s fine if you think I’m being silly.
With his head lowered, tears flowed down his face.
“You’re such a crybaby too.”
I smiled before thinking what a shame this was.
“I’m glad.”
I could pat the head of that blankly crying face like it was nothing now. Amor might hate me for doing this but he would merely ignore me with a look of disapproval.
“I’m glad I could speak to you. It’s because you showed up again. I’m able to tell you this.”
What was done could not be undone. That was a lesson I learned after suffering bitterly over the years.
“You’ve helped me out a couple of times too. Ah, there were still times when you merely stood in the sidelines which made me upset but… Still.”
At some point, I had dumped all my grievances onto him. He learned what love was because he took everything, even accepting the resentment I had thrown at him for crimes he did not commit. But I had fallen in love with someone else, someone who wasn’t him. However.
“I really wanted to tell you this at least once. You’re precious to me too.”
He widened his eyes. Soon, his blue eyes filled with tears before he cried with immense sorrow.
Carefully, I grabbed his hand.
“Thank you for protecting me.”
Knowing my hand would pass through him, I stopped just before I touched his cheek. He smiled faintly with tears in his eyes before placing his cheek on my hand.
“And now I’m going to lose you too.”
Dane’s letter in my hand crumpled slightly.
“I do believe this was my fate but darn this.”
Fleon had already left and Dane and Amor soon joined him.
–…..
He hesitated before staring at me with a forlorn gaze.
–Your Majesty.
With a serious expression on his face, Hernan wiped his tears away before saying.
–Castor doesn’t die when you stab his heart.
Hernan emphasised that I shouldn’t forget this.
–When I stabbed Castor, for a moment, I felt this immense and powerful force.
“What?”
–Is a man who won’t die even when you stab his heart really human? I don’t know. But during those final moments, Castor looked like… He felt like a god”
His figure was beginning to fade starting from his fingertips. Both he and I knew. That his time was almost up. His body began to dissolve even more.
–Don’t be afraid. It is easier to deal with an enemy you know than one you don’t. You will do well, Your Majesty. With the last of my strength, I can tell.
“If I win, would you come back?”
Hernan, who seemed to be smiling at the sky for a moment, then bowed his head.
–You are strong.
HIs lips grazed my forehead. I could not feel it but he left me with his last blessing.
–I know you don’t care about sacrifices. But I still wanted to give it my all.
”…..”
–I’m sure the 6th and 7th Prince felt the same.
More than half his body had disappeared at that point and before I knew it, he was about to vanish into smoke.
–Getting you to know me better when the 4th Prince isn’t here would have been a great opportunity if I dared to take it but it’s a shame.
At the end of the words I never thought he would say, he smiled sadly.
–Well then, goodbye. Your Majesty.
As he turned around, I closed my eyes.
No more words were spoken but when he disappeared, a distinct weight felt like it had been lifted off me.
The spot Hernan once was showed no more signs of life. However, the scent of lilies still lingered in the air. Watching the spot where not even a speck of light was left, I got up slowly.
I was barefoot. My shoes had probably flown off while I was running here. Looking back on the path I had taken here, I could see dark red marks on the white floor. It didn’t hurt.
Not a lamp was lit in this empty palace. Only the moonlight served as a light source. I stared at the sky before closing my eyes.
‘Someone’s coming.’
My gut was screaming at me. Now, instead of reading the diary, perhaps it was better to predict the future this way. I waited for a few minutes before opening my eyes. Before slowly heading for a specific spot.
“Show yourself.”
I quietly said as I approached the dark forest. Rustle. The square bushes shook before a shadow appeared. I stared at the approaching figure unwaveringly before calling out the name of the figure that finally took shape.
“Rusbella.”
Rusbella flashed a beautiful smile.
“Hello Ashley.”
On a night dominated by the full moon, we faced each other once again.