Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm
chapter-139

Chapter 139: Blow Up His Ancestors!

Jiang He could not help flinching at the coquettish, worried voice.

He promptly opened his eyes and withdrew the blazing flames around his body. White steam was everywhere within the vast room, and Sora was standing behind him, her face scarlet as her sexy maid costume was dampened by sweat and steam.

“Get out!”

It was too hot here.

The fire blazing around him when he awakened almost vaporized the entire swimming pool in seconds.

Hence, Sora left.

Jiang He opened a window, and with a gust of True Qi, he blew the steam out of the room.

Then, stretching his senses over his own body, he found that the ocean of swords in his head was now burning with scarlet flames.

At a single thought…

Whoosh.

A streak of fire shot out of his fingertip.

“Fire-type power?”

“It doesn’t feel strong, and it would barely hold up against a rank-six martial artist… its strength is probably a class-B pinnacle.”

After feeling around a bit, Jiang He had a general idea of his fire-type power.

It was very weak.

Untold times weaker than his luminous sword.

Still, Jiang He was very happy.

“It’s fire-type power… with this, starting fires during outdoor camping would be much more convenient!”

Of course, fire-type powers were not limited to the function of starting fires.

He could keep warm when it was cold, dry clothes rapidly, although his Nine Yang True Qi would achieve that as well…

“Actually, it is very convenient to grill meat with fire-type powers, but having barbecue meat when camping out is a state of mind. That makes using fire-type powers even less ideal than buying ready-made meals!”

Heading to his bedroom, Jiang He changed into another set of clothes.

He went downstairs and took his phone from the dining table.

Fortunately, he put his phone on the table when he was eating. It would have been burnt to ashes with his clothes if he had it with him.

Unlocking his screen he found that he missed two WeChat video call requests and three missed calls, all from Duan Tianhe.

But just as he was ready to call back, Duan Tianhe called him again.

When he answered and found out that Duan Tianhe was asking about the willow tree on Mount Helan, Jiang He couldn’t help laughing. “Pudgy Jiang found it too? Well, there’s no need to be afraid. The tree is quite gentle—it even gave me a few branches and a bucket of Origin Fluid.”

“By the way, Chief Duan, I believe that the floral spirit is a life, now that it has gained consciousness and all. It can’t move and it won’t hurt people, so spare its life.”

Pausing, Jiang He then added, “Most importantly, I found its Origin Fluid delicious. If we keep it, we could get more anytime we want.”

Duan Tianhe was silent for a long time on the other end, and only chuckled after some time. “I understand, don’t worry, Jiang He, I’ll send some men to protect that big willow tree of yours.”

“…”

Jiang He was rather speechless even as he listened to the beeping sounds from the other end.

What does that even mean, ‘my big willow tree’?

Why does he put it like he’s being a tyrant? That willow tree had grown on its own on Mount Helan. How did it become his?

“Still, kudos to Old Duan. Protecting the willow tree is a good plan…’

Jiang He smiled.

He knew very well that ‘protecting’ was an excuse. The willow tree was so powerful that it would be fifty-fifty even if Chen Jingzhou went, and the people Duan Tianhe sent would be less than a whipping willow branch…

Still, guarding it from afar was good too.

“I forgot to tell Old Duan that he should wise up to his lackeys. If they spot someone trying to cut my willow tree down, they must inform me as soon as possible…

“Bleh!

“What does that even mean, my willow tree?

“It belongs to nature, please!”

Arriving at the yard, Jiang He took out the three willow branches from his backpack.

They were given ‘generously’ to him by the big willow tree, each of them as thick as his thumb, and there were narrow sword-like leaves on it.

The willow branches were full of life. Jiang He pulled on them for a bit and realized that all three were extremely resilient too, and they did not break even if he used up to forty thousand catties worth of strength.

After all, it was something obtained from a rank-nine floral spirit, and one of the branches that glimmered in crystalline emerald radiance. How could it break so easily?

“If use this branch as a whip for foreplay…”

Jiang He thought of the image then.

Whip!

Someone would die if struck.

He could not help shuddering to glance at Dumbo. Understanding his intention, Dumbo was about to get the shovel when…

Whoosh!

A black gust of wind blew abruptly in the yard, kicking dust into the air.

Dumbo, who was standing up like a human used its paw to shield its eyes so that the dust would not get in, and cursed when it lowered its paw, “What the hell? Where did my shovel go?”

Its dog eyes were round in shock.

The shovel…

Which was leaning on the wall, was gone after a gust of wind?

Dumbo turned to find that the black panther was standing up on its rear legs as well, and was using its paws to carry the shovel, acting cute towards their master even as it dug.

After digging a while with the shovel and perhaps finding it difficult, the black panther threw it away and started to dig with its claws.

Jiang He was blue with shock, and quite unsettled!

Were the dog, cat, and panthers going to try currying his favor every day now?

It was now nine in the evening.

Jiang He redeemed three composite fertilizer and buried the three willow branches in the dark yard.

Willow trees are tough in the first place, and a single branch could grow into a shoot if planted correctly.

Even so, Jiang He did not expect a single branch to survive out of the tree.

That one branch quickly grew a bud and soon became a small willow tree around two meters tall, and only then did its growth slow down.

Stretching out with his consciousness, Jiang He sensed that the two meter-tree contained abundant lifeforce as well… It seems that an emerald radiance was glimmering in its tree trunk, and it would gain sentience soon enough.

When that happens, the willow tree would truly become a floral spirit and become capable of guarding the house.

***

Meanwhile.

Jingdu City, the headquarters of the Martial Arts Department.

Jiang He’s information was on the desk of a man in his thirties.

After reading through it, he could not help laughing. “Interesting kid… Old Zhou, take a trip to Xibei and meet him. I’m having a breakthrough on my cultivation and have something to discuss with the five Holy Grounds… we might be able to use him.”

“Minister Wang!”

There was a twitch on the face of the middle-aged man called ‘Old Zhou’, and he quickly said, “Minister Wang, the five Holy Grounds has an extensive history and hides much of their depth. Now is not the time to turn against them…”

Minister Wang laughed loudly at that, and said meaningfully, “Old Zhou, just look at what you’re saying… it burns my ears!”

“The five Holy Grounds are a faction in the Hua Nation, boasting countless elites. The many extraterrestrial races staring hungrily at Earth would have to face them even before they think about conquering us. This time, I’m just visiting them to build up good relations. How would I dare to burn bridges?”

The corner of Old Zhou’s mouth twitched.

‘You are right!

‘In fact, if I hadn’t happened to hear your call with Commander Li, where you were throwing around words like nuclear option and blow up their ancestors… I would have believed you!’