Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm
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chapter-178
Chapter 178: The Sky Demon Cultists Are Such Nice People
Darkness. Such evident darkness!
After complaining for a bit, Jiang He ignored the matter since it did not have much to do with him anyway.
Leaning on his sofa, he turned his System Panel with a thought.
[Name: Jiang He][Cultivation: Rank-Eight Pinnacle]
[Ability: Royal Sword, fire]
[Martial Arts Cultivation: Indestructible Diamond (Mastery+), Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms (+), Blind Princess’s Eight Practices (Second Practice+), Strengthened Nine Yang Technique (Fifth Tier+), Ninefold Thunderblade (Third Fold+), Dragon-Elephant Prajna (Fifth Tier+), Nine Stars Heavenly Body Formula (First Tier+)]
[Owned Land: 3 Mu]
[Farm Level: 4 (EXP 2400/50000)]
[System Backpack: 18 boxes]
[System Shop: Unlocked][Farm Points: 18300]
Jiang He turned towards System Shop then.
When his System leveled up, it notified Jiang He had unlocked the seeds purchasing clearance. Indeed, there were many seeds now available for purchase, all of which were crops he planted before.
It was likely that he only had the clearance to purchase seeds that he planted, including cucumber, bottle gourd, and eggplant.
One cucumber seed sold for 100 farm points.
One eggplant seed sold for 500 farm points.
One bottle gourd seed sold for 500 farm points.
“…”
Rather speechless, Jiang He could not help complaining, “What are you doing, System? I understand why the cucumbers and carrots are available… but do you mean to have me plant seven more Bottle Gourd Brothers, making bottle gourd seeds available?”
As usual, the System did not reply.
Hehe.
Jiang He sneered.
If the System had remained silent aside from issuing necessary notifications, he would have the feeling that it was retarded.
That said, having seen the bottle gourd seeds in the System Shop, Jiang He finally remembered about the Bottle Gourd Brothers…
“I almost forgot about those seven little things.”
Taking out the seven bottle gourds and blowing on them, seven puff of smokes with different colors landed on the ground and turned into the seven Bottle Gourd Brothers. Somehow, they now looked much smarter, or at least did not look as dimwitted as before.
All of them came to Jiang He, and together said, “Gramps.”
“Sigh…”
Jiang He answered, all smiles.
It felt good after having gotten used to being addressed as gramps, the initial awkwardness notwithstanding.
Patting the seven brothers on the head, he chuckled. “Alright, now go play on your own.”
The brothers all looked thrilled at that, and skipped along as they went out to play in the yard. That did not last long, however, as they each returned with an apple and munched away sweetly, squatting at the yard.
There were many other villagers who grew fruit trees, and now that it was October and the season for harvesting apples, the brothers managed to get many fruits after going out to play.
When Eldest Brother saw Jiang He step out of his mansion, he took out an apple from his bloomers and handed it to him, saying with a babyish voice, “Gramps, eat fruit.”
Jiang He: “…”
He stared at Eldest Brother for three seconds.
Well, it made sense.
The seven brothers all wore bloomers under their dudou, and it seems that it was the only place to put the apple.
Nonetheless, waving him off, Jiang He said, “It’s fine, save it for yourselves… Hold on…”
A thought occurred to Jiang He at that and he exclaimed in shock, “All of you could eat?”
The seven brothers all nodded.
In response, Jiang He clutched his forehead as he felt guilt of having ‘abused children’.
Ever since he planted the Seven Bottle Gourd Brothers, he had never fed them.
Still, they never go hungry now that he thought of it.
After all, each of them is fat and white, and did not look like they ever starved.
Musing to himself for a long time, Jiang He asked, “Since you could eat, could you absorb energy from food to maintain your strength? Or develop yourself by eating?”
Jiang He had a general idea of the principle of charging energy by basking under the sun.
The Seven Bottle Gourd Brothers sprung out of the bottle gourds… in the end, they were ‘crops’, so were they not undergoing photosynthesis under the sun?
Nonetheless, the Seven Bottle Gourd Brothers shook their heads, with Third Brother saying, “We just thought that fruit is tasty, gramps.”
“Oh?”
Jiang He pinched Third Brother’s smiling face, chuckling, “Tasty, my foot. Gramps will get you some lollipops later… oh?”
Jiang He’s facial expression changed even before he finished.
A lightbulb flashed in his head, and Jiang He could not help pondering.
“Crops?”
“Sunbathing?”
“Photosynthesis?”
Firmly slapping himself in the forehead, Jiang He laughed out loud, “I’ve got it! I know how to improve the Seven Bottle Gourd Brothers’ ability now!”
With a thought…
[Ding!]
[-700 Farm Points.]
Seven crystalline nitrogen fertilizers appeared in his hand.
Handing out one pellet, Jiang He smiled, “Come, Eldest Brother. Gramps got some candy for you.
Having neither seen candies nor nitrogen fertilizers, all Eldest Brother knew was that the pellet was sparkling and looked very nice. Extending his tiny hand, he took the nitrogen fertilizer and held it before his nose to sniff it, looking mesmerized and could not help salivating.
He opened his mouth and swallowed the egg-sized fertilizer pellet, crunching as he swallowed.
Jiang He’s spirit radiated away at that, sensing even the most minute change in Eldest Brother’s body.
Once the nitrogen fertilizer entered the kid’s belly, it was instantly turned into nutrients that fused into his limbs and bones, and Jiang He could even distinctly feel wild energy slowly growing within Eldest Brother’s body.
Hence, Jiang He distributed the other six nitrogen fertilizers to the other six brothers and continued observing them.
After Second Brother ate it, his eyes shone and he exclaimed in delight, “Grandpa, my eyes are even brighter and my hearing even sharper now!”
Likewise, after Third Brother ate it, his muscles, bones, and skin all strengthened to some extent. His original ability, [Body of steel, invincible against all weapons], had now become a little stronger.
Beside him, Fourth Brother opened his mouth to breathe fire and thunder, and was delighted at that as well.
Jiang He nodded in utter satisfaction. “Grandkids, be good, and I promise that you’ll have fertilizers—candy every day.”
Since the Seven Bottle Gourd Brothers were basically ‘crops’, consuming normal food naturally would not do.
On the other hand, nitrogen fertilizer is a fertilizer, which promotes growth and development of crops in the first place.
Even Jiang He was in awe of himself. Who else could have thought of this?
Hence, putting the seven bottle gourds under the sun, Jiang He said, “Go back inside the bottle gourds to cultivate when you’re tired. I’m going out for a bit and would soon be back.”
“Yes, Gramps.”
The Seven Bottle Gourd Brothers appeared very obedient.
Even so, once Jiang He drove off and left the farm, they turned into wildlings instantly and wreaked havoc on the farm, hitting Dumbo and Trumbo until they ‘scampered’.
Being the most mischievous, Fourth Brother actually attempted to play with the Cloudscraper Vine.
Right now, having digested the meat Jiang He had fed him, its vines had thickened considerably. Each of its nine tendrils was now almost fifty meters long, and were slowly growing along the walls of the farmyard.
Whip!
One of the tendrils abruptly slapped out and sent Fourth Brother flying.
He broke out in tears, but after crying for seconds, he cheerfully went to climb the willow tree… and was left squealing by the shining willow branches in no time at all.
“Demon! You dare bully Fourth Brother?”
Furious, Eldest Brother promptly giantized and punched out at the willow tree.
In response, the willow tree’s branches took to the air and whipped Eldest Brother, leaving him squealing in mercy… but when the branches pulled back, he became cocky again.
“Brothers, kill that tree!”
“Fourth Brother, burn it and hit it with your lightning!”
“Fifth Brother, drown it with your water breath!”
“Bow-wow-wow-wow!!!”
Dumbo barked, beside itself in worry as it cried out in its Xibei-Sichuan accent, “Stop, stop! Master would get angry when he gets back!”
***
Jiang He was not aware of what was going on back home.
He was folding his leg whilst munching on walnuts and blended qi pellets while ‘driving’ his sports car to Lingzhou city.
First, he stopped by at the seed market and bought some paddy seeds and wheat seeds.
The seed shop owner kindly reminded him, saying, “Kid, now’s not the season for paddy or wheat. It’s already October—it would be winter by the time they yield anything.”
“Thanks for your heads up, boss.”
Jiang He thanked him, but was not particularly concerned with the owner’s words.
Winter?
It would be months until winter comes, just as the growth cycle of crops in his farms was shortened by over a dozen times. The paddy and wheat that could only be harvested after months could be taken in at ten days, at most.
Jiang he then went of to buy other seeds and chicken eggs before arriving at the entrance of the Martial Arts Department (MAD).
Still, he did not enter.
If he did and ran into any acquittanced, the long-winded conversations that ensue would take up a lot of his time.
He simply remained inside his car and dialed Wang Siyu’s number, and she soon came out.
“Over here!”
Jiang He opened his door and got off.
Today, Wang Siyu was wearing a red body-hugging jersey which accentuated her form very well.
She smiled. “When did you return from Jiangnan? Did you run into any trouble on the way?”
“Just got back this morning.”
Jiang He replied, before rearing his head, puffing and patting his chest. “With my ability, anyone I don’t bother would have to offer devoted prayers in thanks. Who would come to trouble me?”
Wang Siyu blinked.
That indeed seemed to be the case.
“Right, the matter you asked me last time is settled. Your former neighbors said that they are giving you their houses for free after hearing that you want to buy it from them, and now that Jinyintan Village is categorized as wildlands and the government had bought houses for everyone, it would be hard on their conscience if they took your money.
Jiang He chuckled.
The villagers of Jinyintan Village were good people.
Still, he had a lot of money now…
With nowhere to spent over nine thousand catties of gold and having several hundred million in his bank account, the stuff was just left there for nothing.
Hence, after musing for a moment, Jiang He said, “How about this? I’ll take every house in the village. Talk to your father’s side when it’s settled, and I’ll pay around two hundred thousand dollars for each house owner. Money is just a number to me now.”
Then, after a few more exchanges, Wang Siyu suddenly lowered her voice and said, “The Sky Demon Cult is up to something big lately, Jiang He. I heard someone mention that there seemed to be some heritage site and treasure here in Lingzhou City that keeps drawing them here—you have to be more careful since you are staying alone in the village.”
“For real?”
Even so, Jiang He’s eyes were sparkling.
That was astoundingly good news…
Still, he could not help sighing. “The Sky Demon Cultists are such good people. Just when I’m feeling bored lately, they came to add some joys to my life, huh?”
As an idea struck him then, Jiang He added, “Well, please talk to the others about buying their houses in my stead. Make it quick, too, since I could use their yards in the next few days!”
Jiang He already had a plan in mind.
When he gets back, he would make his house and farm invincible.
If the Sky Demon Cultists would dare to come…
They were never leaving!
