How To Live As A Writer In A Fantasy World
chapter-320

There is a word called ‘black history’ (흑역사). It refers to a past that is embarrassing to speak about or experiences that one feels uncomfortable even acknowledging.

There was no word to replace ‘black history’ in my previous life, so it was a term I used quite frequently. There’s nothing else that so succinctly refers to a past one wishes to erase.

Why do I mention this? Because our cute elf queen has just updated her ‘black history’ once again. It was an education, sure, but it was an education heavily spiced with her own personal desires. Unintentionally, her innermost thoughts were completely revealed.

How should the dew of the World Tree be applied, how should the first night be spent, and so on. Compared to her previous statement about elven communism, this was even more intense. If there had been a mouse hole, she would have crawled into it.

Honestly, she essentially revealed her ideal first night to me. Who wouldn’t be embarrassed by that? Moreover, Arwen has a romantic interest in me. If it were me, I would not only hide but run away. And I would never show my face to that person again.

“Excuse me.”

“··· ···”

“Arwen?”

That’s what Arwen is doing now. Having completely melted from Cecily’s heavy dose of truth. Fortunately, she didn’t teleport away but crammed herself into the small space under the desk. As you know, it’s the desk I use to write Xenon’s Biography. She looked around for a place to hide and chose here.

The space itself was spacious enough, and since Arwen’s frame was small, it wasn’t a tight fit. It was a bit big to be called a mouse hole, but it was sufficient.

“Um······”

I scratched my head as I watched Arwen, who, like the last time she made the elven communism statement, was not showing me her face. It was cute, like a child showing only their back, and it felt like something she would do.

Especially, Arwen’s best feature, her back line, was a delightful sight for my eyes. From her slender waist to her attractive hip line, it was mesmerizing. Moreover, the dress she was wearing this time had slits on the sides, fully showcasing her charm.

But that’s that, and this is this. I called Arwen, who had her face buried between her knees, once again.

“Arwen? Can you answer me?”

“··· ···”

Although I asked in a gentle voice, Arwen remained unmoved. Instead, she buried her face even deeper between her legs. Smiling bitterly, I looked around.

Marie, Cecily, and Adelia each had different expressions. Marie had her arms crossed, raising one corner of her mouth as if amused, Cecily looked somewhat disdainful, and Adelia had a wry smile.

With each of them showing different reactions, I gave another awkward smile and turned my gaze back to Arwen. Leaving her like this wasn’t right, and more importantly, now that I knew her true feelings, there was no need to back off.

Poke poke

“Eeek…!”

So, I pressed my finger into the exposed side of her dress. Since it was a direct touch and not through the fabric, Arwen flinched noticeably.

Thud!

“Ouch!”

And then she banged her head on the desk. I looked at Arwen, who was holding her head and crying out, with a sympathetic gaze. Outwardly, she was a wise and charismatic queen, but right now, she seemed more like a helpless child.

While that might be part of her charm, I needed to clear up the misunderstanding for our conversation to proceed.

“Ugh…”

“Come on, let’s talk face to face. I know you’re embarrassed, so don’t just show me your back.”

Maybe because it was something I said in a situation where she was fully alert, Arwen started to slowly turn around, gently rubbing her head.

I don’t know why she doesn’t just come out from under the desk, but it seems she lacked the courage due to updating her ‘black history.’ It’s always something I think about, but it seems the position really does shape the person.

“Are you feeling a bit calmer now?”

“…A little.”

Arwen answered while turning her head, seemingly having no intention of coming out from under the desk. Her flushed face and twitching ears conveyed her emotions well. She occasionally glanced at me, but she didn’t seem to have the courage to meet my eyes directly.

I wondered if it was okay to continue the conversation like this, but thinking it through, I knew it wasn’t. So, I extended my hand.

“Don’t stay there; come out. We have a lot to talk about.”

“…”

Arwen alternated between looking at my extended hand and my face before cautiously reaching out. After hesitating a few times, she gently placed her hand in mine.

It was only now that I realized Arwen’s hands were as small as her petite frame. However, her hands were elegant and beautiful. I hadn’t noticed before since I had never held her hand.

“…I’ve shown you such disgrace. I’m really sorry.”

Arwen quietly apologized as she emerged from under the desk, though she still couldn’t meet my eyes.

“No, it’s… understandable.”

“Your answer seems a bit delayed?”

Marie, who had been silently observing, interjected, having noticed that my words lacked sincerity. She had an uncanny ability to discern the true meaning behind people’s words, leaving me without an excuse. She was right, after all.

The only saving grace was that Arwen didn’t crawl back under the desk. I glared at Marie for her tactless remark and then turned my attention back to Arwen. Regardless of age or gender, people deeply in love often act irrationally. When facing the person they love, they may become flustered or make mistakes in their speech.

There’s a reason why lovesickness exists and why some people die from it. Love is an emotion that easily breaks a person’s heart. Just like Arwen right now. I looked at Arwen, who was clutching the hem of her dress and shyly avoiding my gaze.

Her silver-gray hair and eyes resembled the Milky Way in the night sky. She had the beautiful appearance typical of an elf, often called the embodiment of beauty. In contrast to Cecily’s mature image, Arwen had a youthful appearance and a petite frame, but with a surprisingly well-proportioned figure.

“Arwen.”

“…Speak.”

“Shall we talk for a moment? Not about education, but something else.”

I felt I needed to hear Arwen’s true feelings at least once. At my suggestion, Arwen looked up and then gazed at the other women instead of me. Everyone knew what that look meant. Following Arwen’s gaze, I turned my head as well.

“Cecily, you expected this, right?”

“It would be strange if I didn’t. What about you, Adelia?”

“I will follow whatever Young Master decides.”

“You heard them?”

Marie, having heard everyone’s opinions, handed the decision-making power back to me. Whether she had given up or had been compliant since I revealed myself as Xenon, I wasn’t sure. But thanks to their consideration and concession, I could make a choice. I turned my gaze back to Arwen.

Arwen seemed to have noticed something from the reactions and looked directly at me. Her tightly pressed lips and her brightly shining silver-gray eyes were incredibly adorable. I smiled softly and spoke to her in a slightly cautious voice.

“Arwen.”

“Y-Yes, speak.”

“You might have heard during the presentation, but I’m not as great a person as you think. Even if your hypothesis is correct, it doesn’t change the fact that I’m an ordinary person.”

It feels like a deception, but it’s not a lie. As Arwen suspects, I am indeed someone from another world. But in that world, I was like a rolling stone. An author who endlessly wrote novels, deeply affected by the shock of my parents’ accidental death.

Of course, there’s almost no chance my past life will be revealed, but if it somehow gets out? What kind of reaction would there be? This goes not just for me but for others as well. Currently, misconceptions are piling up, and this could come back to haunt me.

“S-So, is what I’m thinking correct? Really?”

“Uh…”

Contrary to my expectations, Arwen seemed fixated on a peculiar part of my words. The moment she heard me, her silver-gray eyes began to sparkle. Unsure of how to respond, I hesitantly nodded.

After all, with Cecily present, I couldn’t lie. Though I wouldn’t disclose the details, even this felt like shedding a layer of protection.

“Yes, but that’s all I can say.”

“I knew it… So, it’s not a ‘restriction’ but more like a ‘rebound’ side effect. Even simple teleportation causes a rebound depending on the distance, so if it’s to that extent…”

Perhaps because she’s well-versed in magic, Arwen, upon hearing my ambiguous response, started diving into her imagination. The thought of having to explain not only the restrictions but now also the rebound was daunting.

“What do you mean? Rebound? Can’t elves and demons use magic freely?”

“That’s true, but there’s no such thing as no rebound. For example, if you push a boulder with your bare hands, it strains your muscles. It’s similar to that.”

“Oh, I get it now.”

Marie and Cecily were chatting away beside me, but I let their conversation go in one ear and out the other. Arwen was far more important at that moment. I cleared my throat to change the atmosphere. Startled, Arwen snapped out of her theoretical musings.

“Ahem. Ahem. I apologize for showing such disgrace again.”

“It’s nothing. Anyway, Arwen.”

Now, to the main point. I looked directly at Arwen and asked in a soft, gentle voice.

“Why do you like me?”

In response to my question, she gave a bright, cheerful smile and replied.

“There are too many reasons to choose just one.”

“…”

I was rendered speechless. This was the first time I had seen Arwen smile so innocently and brightly.

Feeling embarrassed, I gently rubbed the back of my neck before composing myself. There was only one thing left to do.

“Then…”

“There’s no need to say it. Actually, I prefer if you don’t.”

Just before I could accept her, Arwen shook her head and stopped me from speaking. She had made her feelings so obvious before, yet now she didn’t want me to say anything. I raised an eyebrow, puzzled by her sudden change.

In the meantime, Arwen slowly reached out and gently held my hands, softly squeezing them. She then looked at me with a bright smile and shyly confessed her feelings.

“Can you wait a little until I gather the courage? When that time comes, I’ll bring the gift I mentioned before.”

“Is that really necessary?”

“It is, at least for me. Until now, I’ve only received from you, so please allow me to give meaning to this too.”

Although her face looked like it was about to melt from embarrassment, her voice was firm. It seemed I had to take a step back here. I nodded in agreement, and Arwen’s smile became even brighter. I wondered what kind of event she was preparing that required such effort.

“Oh. Is there a specific time you have in mind? I can adjust to your preferred time.”

“Um… can you give me about a month? There’s someone else I need to deal with first.”

“Is it a woman?”

“…”

Her intuition was spot on. As she guessed, I was planning to resolve things with Leona, specifically with her mother. Marie had told me that Leona was urgently looking for me. Her mother was likely at the academy too.

“I thought so. Well, it’s natural for a hero who saved the world to have many women around him. Have you heard of ‘heroic lechery’?”

“I know what it means, but I don’t think it’s a fitting title for me…”

“You lie so shamelessly, Xenon! Just look at us!”

Just as I was about to reject the title I couldn’t accept, Cecily, filled with mischief, shouted loud enough for everyone to hear.

…I can’t deny it now. Hearing her shout, I stiffened up. On the other hand, Arwen let out a faint laugh as if she found it amusing. It seemed she didn’t mind having more women around me.

“It’s fine. Just being with you is enough for me. Anyway, this conversation has gone on for quite a while. I’m sorry if I haven’t been much help, as I believe you called me for assistance.”

“Don’t worry about it. Thanks to you, I now know what I need to do moving forward. It doesn’t necessarily have to be about Xenon’s Biography.”

“…That mischievous nature of yours hasn’t changed.”

Arwen seemed to realize who my words were targeting. Her face instantly turned red, and she looked so adorable that I wanted to pinch her cheeks.

“Well then, I’ll be off. Let’s meet exactly one month and fifteen days from today. You can look forward to the gift prepared in Alvenheim.”

“I’ll be looking forward to it.”

“Wait a minute, Isaac.”

Just as things were about to wrap up, Marie slowly walked towards us. Come to think of it, there was still a hurdle left.

Arwen looked at her with a puzzled expression, while Marie also stared at her intently. The two women stared at each other for a while. In the tense atmosphere, Marie was the first to speak.

“You might have finished talking with Isaac, but our conversation isn’t over, is it? You shouldn’t think you can just brush this off.”

“Ah… Th-That’s true.”

“Alright! Shall we go? Cecily and Adelia, you come along too.”

And so, Arwen was dragged to another room. I had no idea what they were going to talk about, but I hoped they wouldn’t be too harsh.

How much time passed after that?

“I-I’ll be going now!”

Arwen left the mansion as if she were fleeing. Just before leaving, she alternated between looking at my face and something below it.

Seeing her leave in such a hurry made me curious, so I asked Marie what they talked about…

“We just gave her a ‘preview.’ That’s really all.”

“…?”

“We were fine, but it seemed like it would be really tough for the queen.”

All I got was a vague answer that didn’t really clarify anything.

*****

Time passed, and when volumes 24 and 24.5 were released.

[The identity of the book released alongside volume 24 is… none other than A Beautiful Night of Love.]

[Explicit and detailed psychological depictions of both parties.]

[It must be based on Xenon’s own experiences. However, isn’t the content a bit too explicit…?]

“Oh, right.”

I forgot to bribe the media.

Translators note:

‘I forgot to bribe the media.’ This dude.