I Shall Seal the Heavens (Web Novel)
chapter-0

Interlude (beware of quasi, micro-“spoilers” of Xian Ni and Beseech the Devil!)

Amidst the boundless stars exists a vast, almost endless continent that seemed to be the very edge of the universe. It was apparently the last stop before the end of everything.

An infinite amount of spirits existed in this place, in the eastern region of which was a lake. Next to the lake was a house with a courtyard. Sitting next to the lake was middle-aged man, currently fishing. He had a mark on his forehead that appeared as if it might be a third eye. He looked handsome and intelligent, and his entire person emanated a strange, heretical aura.

He sat there, seemingly fused with the world itself, as if when he opened his eyes, it was day, and when he closed them, it was night.

This was Su Ming, also known as Old Devil Su.

After some time passed, he lifted his head and looked up into the sky. A figure was approaching, that reached him almost immediately.

“Pockmarked Wang,” said Su Ming slowly, his eyes shining brightly. “I’ve been waiting for you for a long time.”

“Old Devil Su, I’ve been here for quite some time.” He was a middle-aged man with a full head of white hair. His features were beyond ordinary, and he possessed an indescribable aura. His smile and his voice made him seem as if he were the Lord of everything. He seemed to have lived a life of killing, a life of defiance of the Heavens. His name was Wang Lin, also known as Pockmarked Wang.

“I heard that Er Gen was violated again,” Su Ming said.

Wang Lin laughed. “He violated so many other people in the past… this is simply the cycle of Karma. I’ve been separated from him by countless stars, for three years. I haven’t really been paying much attention to him.” A ponderous look filled his eyes as he stared out over the lake water, apparently recalling old memories.

“This time, he was violated by a large group of people,” said Su Ming slowly.

“Then violate them back!” said Wang Lin calmly with the flick of a sleeve.

“I am Wang Lin from Xian Ni!”

“I am Su Ming from Beseech the Devil!”

“For the sake of the five years of these stories, the both of us beg all Fellow Daoists to give monthly vote tickets to Er Gen and ‘Spirit Stones’ to Deathblade!”

—–

For those of you who upvoted my comment on reddit a while back, this is the interlude I previously didn’t translate. As usual, this is all Er Gen’s except for the tweak to the final line. By the way, what I’m translating as “violate” literally is “pop the chrysanthemum” which is a euphamism for … ahem. Yeah, you get it. I couldn’t find any information to indicate what the heck is going on in this passage, although some speculation is that it might have to do with certain characteristics of the copper mirror… Your guess is as good as mine, if anyone has more info please let me know….