I’m an Infinite Regressor, But I’ve Got Stories to Tell
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chapter-112
One Who Was a Companion IV
How much time had passed?
In the night sky devoid of the ticking of clocks, only the periodic, extravagant explosions of the fireworks measured the length of the silence.
"An anomaly... me? I, Dang Seo-rin?"
It was after the fourth firework painted the sky red that Dang Seo-rin finally opened her mouth.“That can’t be true. What are you talking about, Undertaker? I’m the same as before, nothing has changed. How could I be an anomaly…”
“Yes, nothing has changed. But our abilities themselves are a kind of anomaly. Awakening, transcendence, ascension—no matter how grand the words, they are inherently alien phenomena in the real world. You must have had some inkling.”
“...…”
I sipped my coffee. While giving Dang Seo-rin her affogato, I made myself a café au lait.
“I don’t particularly like the habit of comparing a human to a small universe, but a human is indeed a small space. Just because one awakens their ability doesn’t mean they instantly become a complete anomaly. It happens slowly. Like the void eroding the land, the process of becoming an anomaly goes through many procedures and stages.”
“…What nonsense procedures and stages?”
“I don’t claim to know everything. But in your case, it’s clear. Your rapid transformation into an anomaly began when your golden scales started influencing other people’s personalities.”“That doesn’t make any sense…”
“Let’s delve into a more complex concept.”
Let’s compare an anomaly to a force.
We say that water falls, that a coffee can spills on the floor, that a ball drops from the Leaning Tower of Pisa—all due to the force of gravity.
Anomalies and the Void are the same.
‘Why does walking to the right in the Inunaki Tunnel result in drowning?’ ‘Why did the area where the Meteor Shower fell turn into an ashen zone?’ ‘Why do all objects and spaces lose their boundaries in the Infinite Void, reduced to mere qualia?’
The answers to these questions are clear.
‘Because it’s the Inunaki Tunnel.’
‘Because it’s the Meteor Shower.’
‘Because it’s the Infinite Void.’
Each anomaly has the power to create its own events.
Just as objects are drawn to gravity, the Meteor Shower has the property of turning its surroundings into ashes.
Anomalies become the causes that produce strange results in this world.
It’s as if one can only say, ‘The reason for this bizarre occurrence is because of that anomaly.’
Conversely, the method of subduing an anomaly follows this line of analysis.
‘The reason part of the Inunaki Tunnel is flooded is because it is mixed with the mythology of the Sanzu River.’
‘The myth of a river flowing in the afterlife is found not only in the Sanzu River but also in the Styx.’
‘Therefore, if one carries gold or silver coins to pay the ferryman of the underworld, they will not drown in the Inunaki Tunnel.’
One analyzes the anomaly.
By dissecting the anomaly, which was pinpointed as the ultimate cause of the incident, one interprets it as ‘even an anomaly is just a result established by other causes.’
This is the method I declared as certain around the 100th run.
To restore the world to the proper chain of causality. To eliminate the voids scattered like holes in the world.
This was the essence of the ‘method to fight anomalies’ that I established.
“Dang Seo-rin. Among the people living in this city, is there anyone who doesn’t owe you?”
“……”
“At the top of that four-story villa lives a young man named Yoo Chul-won. He suffered from insomnia. Five years ago, he received a witch trial from you, and thanks to that, he spends every day and night, and thus his entire daily life, refreshingly. The cause of ‘Yoo Chul-won’s daily life’ is you, Dang Seo-rin.”
“…..”
“The reason a psychopath like Yu Ji-won can genuinely care for and like others, to the extent of holding small parties with friends every week, is what? Dang Seo-rin, it’s you.”
“…”
“The reason all the people in this city wake up happy in the morning, work diligently throughout the day, spend time happily with loved ones in the evening, and sleep peacefully at night without worries—this is true for not just one or two people but for all the citizens of the city. It’s solely because of you, Dang Seo-rin.”
“……”
“Simply ruling a city doesn’t turn you into an anomaly, but this city is now indistinguishable from you.”
Why is this city so happy?
Why do such and such events occur in this city?
The answer to these questions.
—Because it’s Dang Seo-rin.
“This place is Utopia.”
“……”
“A land ruled by a witch who can render perfect judgments in any trial and eternally send beautiful songs through the city. The most benevolent void in the world. If my words don’t seem credible… you can test it. Your Equivalent Exchange magic will now work even on anomalies.”
“That…”
“You could give anomalies self-awareness, implant past memories, and bestow human forms. Of course, it would require many trials and even more time... But if luck is on your side, you might be able to turn the entire world into your domain, a void called Utopia.”
“...…”
Silence settled.
The fireworks stopped exploding.
It was as if the entire city had held its breath. Even the distant, pleasant humming of the drunkards and the laughter of the witches subsided.
As Dang Seo-rin breathed, the lights across the city flickered. When the yellow lights all blinked simultaneously, Dang Seo-rin smiled strangely.
“Then… are you going to subdue me now?”
“...…”
“It’s a common story. The hero defeats the Demon King, but the real mastermind was the king who supported the hero all along, leading the hero to the final stage. The greatest ally turns out to be the ultimate last boss. Isn’t that a worn-out cliché?”
“......”
“Right, Undertaker. Come to think of it, I don’t remember you calling Busan ‘Busan’ recently. You always referred to it as ‘this city’ or ‘here.’ You’ve suspected it for a while, haven’t you? That I would turn into an anomaly, that Busan would become the void.”
“Yes.”
“You’re really a bad guy. But then again, you did warn me. You said it was unpredictable what would happen. I caused the current situation.”
Dang Seo-rin stood up. Blackie jumped down.
With a snap, a broom flew to her hand from the terrace. Dang Seo-rin donned the conical hat she had placed on the table.
“Perfect. If you fabricate news about the monster wave being defeated, the entire city would obviously celebrate. I’d take time off to drink with you. My personal guards are all scattered, and most are probably drunk. Perfect timing, isn’t it? Have you already recruited Cheon Yo-hwa to your side? …Ah. I see. No wonder she quietly withdrew from today’s meeting.”
“......”
“Still, Undertaker, I can’t give up my city. It’s an oasis painstakingly created in this wretched world. No matter what anyone says, I, my citizens, are human. No, I’ll make us the only human species from now on. So if you plan to subdue me and this place—be prepared for death.”
I stood up as well.
“No.”
Unlike Dang Seo-rin, I had no weapon in hand. The cane sword made by a blacksmith no longer existing in this world remained tilted beside me.
Because this story doesn’t end that way.
“I won’t subdue you.”
“…What?”
I lightly grasped Dang Seo-rin’s hand.
There was a slight tremor, but I didn’t mind and pulled her closer.
In the exact opposite direction from a thousand years ago.
-You’ve got a fierce look in your eyes.
-……
-You’re that person, right? The only survivor from Busan Station. The eccentric who always asks strange questions.
A long time ago during the 4th run.
My first meeting with Dang Seo-rin was before I had the Complete Memory Ability.
I couldn’t guarantee if our meeting really happened that way, if it was raining around us, or if we had this exact conversation.
-Name?
-…Undertaker. It’s a pseudonym.
-You’re someone who buries people? Not bad. The depth of a person depends on how many corpses they’ve buried in their heart.
But one thing was certain, remembered as an indelible truth even if it faded.
-How about it?
Back then, Dang Seo-rin extended her hand to me.
Call it a regressor’s intuition. The moment I looked up at the black-haired witch with a broom in one hand and a conical hat on her head, I already knew that a continuous line of my endless life had intertwined with hers.
-Wanna join our guild?
I took that hand.
Just like now.
Only the direction had changed.
“I will never, no matter what, hurt you.”
“……”
“I don’t care if you become an anomaly. Even if you turn this city, the world, into the void. Even if you burn the entire world, Dang Seo-rin. I will still be by your side.”
“Ah.”
We were alike.
My ability, Time Seal, the reason I was called Undertaker, also merely handed people an eternally happy day.
Even if it was a fake, as long as no one noticed, it was no different from the real thing.
The Utopia Dang Seo-rin created was the same. Even if people’s happiness was obtained through deals with the witch, perhaps it was the best happy ending this world could achieve.
This route was never a bad ending.
A world where Dang Seo-rin lived to the end, where her dream city was realized, could never be recorded as a bad ending for me.
“If you ever get tired of ruling the city and want to leave, we can leave together anytime.”
“……”
“If you want to turn the entire world into your Utopia, I’ll gladly be your sword and lead the way.”
Her hand trembled.
Dang Seo-rin.
My guild master.
“You allowed me to stay by your side even after becoming an anomaly. Whether it was conscious or unconscious doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter at all. You are the reason I live.”
You are the cause of my existence.
To inherit each other’s place and still be together. That was the only difference between anomalies and humans.
No matter how deep we fell into the void, it wouldn’t turn into hell.
“So don’t worry.”
“...…”
“We can go anywhere.”
Dang Seo-rin hugged me.
The city lights came on. Witches flew crisscross in the night sky. The noise of drunkards and the song from the speakers intertwined.
Fireworks exploded.
“…I want to travel.”
“Okay.”
“Maybe I shouldn’t have given up on the national roads. No, railways. The Railroad Management Corps or something. Instead of staying in Busan, I should’ve built a fortress train like the one in ‘Snowpiercer’ and kept traveling around the country. That would’ve been much more fun.”
“Okay.”
I hugged Dang Seo-rin’s shoulders. I patted her back.
“Dang Seo-rin.”
“Yeah…?”
“I’m actually a regressor.”
Dang Seo-rin looked up at me.
“A regressor…?”
“Yes. I actually repeat the world endlessly. My life has ended over a hundred times. Every time I wake up, it’s always the tutorial dungeon at Busan Station.”
“……”
I told her.
The magic called Cursed Song Incantation burns life to spread the song, but actually, the lifespan accumulates with each run.
“But you told me in the tenth life not to ever tell you the secret that I’m a regressor. Because you’re greedy, if you found out such a secret, you’d use up all the remaining lifespan to create a happy ending in the current run.”
“Ah… indeed. That makes sense.”
Despite knowing I was a regressor, Dang Seo-rin quickly understood. She probably had her own thoughts about my identity.
Soon, Dang Seo-rin smiled.
“You’re foolish.”
“Who? You from the 10th run?”
“No, you.”
When I looked at her in confusion, Dang Seo-rin’s smile deepened.
“Why didn’t you kill me immediately at the start of each run?”
“…What?”
“You fool. The sooner I die, the longer my ‘original lifespan’ accumulates for the next run. If my original lifespan was 60 years, you could’ve transferred all 60 years to the next run each time… Why didn’t you kill me?”
“Wait, what? You’re saying that now—”
I couldn’t continue my rebuttal.
Dang Seo-rin’s face was right in front of me. Her breath was close. The coffee taste, mixed with ice cream flavor.
The scent of grass after a summer rain.
Dang Seo-rin slowly pulled back.
“...…”
“Was that your first kiss in this life?”
“That…”
“Ah. No, don’t answer.”
Dang Seo-rin parted her lips and sang. Above us, a small golden scale hung.
Dang Seo-rin whispered playfully.
“Undertaker, put all the memories of your kisses on the scale. Whether they exist or not. In this run, in all runs.”
“...…”
“Hurry up.”
I did so.
I couldn’t know what Dang Seo-rin placed on the right side of the scale in exchange for my memories on the left. Nor could I mention what memories I lost anymore. The golden scale in the air shone brightly, deeming the balance achieved.
“Okay. Now close your eyes.”
In the old night sky, with the golden light illuminating like fireworks, Dang Seo-rin pulled me by the arm.
“—This is now our first kiss.”
Our shadows overlapped.
While fireworks scattered in the distance, a thought occurred to me.
As Dang Seo-rin was the cause of my existence, perhaps I was also the cause of Dang Seo-rin’s existence.
If so, tonight might be the moment when the gentlest ‘strategy’ against an anomaly temporarily existed.
And…
Though I would never remember it, the memory Dang Seo-rin erased with the golden scale was probably no different from the person in front of me now.
There is an epilogue.
When I opened my eyes, I was staring at the ceiling of the tutorial dungeon at Busan Station, not the terrace of Utopia.
The 173rd run had ended.
“……”
Why?
What led to my death?
Regarding the reason for my death, I have the following hypotheses.
First hypothesis: Upon hearing that her lifespan accumulated across runs, Dang Seo-rin resolved to die with me.
‘Utopia’ Busan wasn’t established without cost. The songs from the speakers, the Equivalent Exchange of the golden scale, everything originated from Dang Seo-rin’s Cursed Song Incantation.
The price of Cursed Song Incantation was lifespan.
Even the smallest magic in Utopia ran on Dang Seo-rin’s life as fuel.
Of course, the resource had secured thousands of years, but it was certain that the end would come someday.
Dang Seo-rin decided to save that fuel.
For me.
For a better true ending we hadn’t yet reached.
…But there’s also a completely different second hypothesis.
Perhaps Dang Seo-rin didn’t die immediately after the kiss.
We might have lived the 173rd run as if nothing happened, spreading ‘Utopia’ not just in Busan but across the entire Korean Peninsula, and eventually the world.
After many moments of happiness and unhappiness, luck and misfortune—after concluding a grand epic, when Dang Seo-rin’s lifespan finally burned out.
For some reason I can’t imagine now, perhaps Dang Seo-rin asked me to forget ‘the memory from the kiss to now.’
As a result, I regressed with only the memory up to our kiss.
Both interpretations can be valid.
I have no intention of digging into which hypothesis is correct. After all, neither is a bad ending for me.
I intend to leave that moment of blankness, the ‘imperfect memory’ part, the night sky of fireworks—gladly within me as a space of void for Dang Seo-rin.
Forever.
Footnotes:
