I’m an Infinite Regressor, But I’ve Got Stories to Tell
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chapter-230
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The Winter Soldier IV
You can probably guess by now, but Anomalies have an inherent trait that's similar to severe otaku tendencies: They can't distinguish between 'reality' and 'fiction.'
To be more precise, for Anomalies, everything is the same as reality—another similarity to otaku. Just as otaku believe in the true 2D world beyond their monitors, Anomalies perceive everything they see as being of equal or greater value than reality.
‘Of course, each Anomaly has things they like or dislike more.’I used this ‘otaku test’ on the Ice Age Anomaly.
When did I start doing that? From the very beginning, when I first encountered it.
"Saintess, use Telepathy on the prisoners, but please act like you're communicating through a real radio."
"Pardon? Why is that?"
"I have my reasons. Also, it would be great if you could add static noise like a real radio."
The radios the prisoners carried out had no real function, and the Saintess had never actually used a radio either. Yet the Ice Age Anomaly still perceived the radio communication with the prisoners as 'real.'
The Anomaly corrupted the radio transmission without hesitation and even added noise that the Saintess never pretended to make.At this point, I was sure.
‘Sure enough, this bastard isn't the type of Anomaly that insists on the physical, real world.’
I had actually felt this way since the moment the Anomaly was lured to New York by the replica of the Statue of Liberty. The more sensory-deficient the Anomaly—think those lacking sight or smell—the more it relied on concepts rather than the physical world. It was similar to how in ancient rituals meant to appease malevolent spirits, instead of real money, people burned a single paper talisman that read "one million dollars."
"...Undertaker, what exactly are you doing right now?"
"Can't you see? I'm editing videos."
A real tragedy unfolding in reality.
A fictional tragedy happening in media.
The Ice Age Anomaly could hardly differentiate between the two.
"Videos? What videos...?"
"Movies."
Click. Click-click-click. Click.
I moused over the screen, still editing. My editing skills weren't on the level of a seasoned expert, but they were good enough for someone who's experienced hundreds of regressions.
The video source material, of course, was all footage we had just filmed inside the Statue of Liberty.
「Forward! For our comrades!」
「Let’s go! Rescue humanity!」
「Ooooooh!」
At that moment, the scene of the ten brainwashed individuals leaving the bunker, ignoring their comrades' protests, was playing.
I reassembled the footage filmed from various angles and added sound effects. It certainly wasn’t an example of professional cinematography, but I didn't care about that at all.
「Forward! For our comrades!」
「Hehehe, heehee, heeheehee!」
「Let’s go! Rescue humanity!」
I didn’t even need to try. The Anomaly took over the video, inserting horror elements in between to heighten the atmosphere.
The edited video was completely different from ‘reality.’
Behind the ten brainwashed people in the video, corpses frozen in ice clung to their bodies. The brainwashed weren’t moving of their own accord. The frozen ghosts were dragging them out of the gates by their wrists and ankles.
"......"
Do-hwa, who had been watching the laptop next to me, looked as if she were about to faint.
It wasn’t just the brainwashed. The ghosts clung to all the survivors who hadn’t fully succumbed to the Anomaly.
There was a ghost clinging to someone’s shoulder, wrapping its hands around their head, another ghost gnawing at Do-hwa’s leg, and yet another banging its head against the bunker door repeatedly.
"...What is all this?"
"It’s the real reason we feel ‘cold.’ These ghosts are making us feel cold by attaching themselves to us."
"...The fuck?"
"Even if you try to get rid of them now, it won’t work, Commander Noh Do-hwa. The filters are different, so you can’t interfere with them."
For the record, I wasn’t filming our surroundings at that moment. All the management officers except for the top brass were asleep, anyway. I seized the chance and used our break time to jump into editing the footage I collected.
By the time I finished for the day and played the video back, the Anomaly had automatically started the post-production process. In it, ‘Undertaker’ and ‘Noh Do-hwa’ were suddenly spouting lines they’d never said.
「Undertaker.」
「Yes.」
「Now that we’re alone, I have something I’ve been curious about for a while. Do you... like me?」
Beside me, I heard an outraged, "What the fuck?" It wasn’t the Noh Do-hwa in the video, but the real one, her voice fresh like squeezed fruit juice.
The fruit in question was probably durian.
"I’ve never said anything like that in my fucking life."
"Neither have I." It was a fascinating phenomenon to me. "This is probably the Anomaly’s perception of reality. From our perspective, it’s a distortion."
"Of all the ways to distort things, why the fuck would it choose this?"
"Because it’s an Anomaly. Hmm. If I had to guess, maybe it interpreted us holding hands under the blanket as being in a romantic relationship or something."
"Shit. I knew I should’ve let go back then, even if it meant freezing to death..."
"Why are you overreacting? It’s just a harmless distortion by the Anomaly, anyway."
The video continued, with the credits reading, “Script: Ice Age, Editing: Ice Age, Sound: Ice Age.”
「Of course I like you. I can't start my day without seeing your rotten eyes, Commander Noh Do-hwa.」
「Hmph. You know that's not what I was asking...」
「......」
「You know the Guild Leader of Samcheon World likes you, right? You’re not oblivious. So why do you keep testing them?」
「Hmm. I didn’t expect this kind of conversation...」
"......"
"......"
A strange quiet descended over us, the two of us settled side by side, as we stared at the laptop screen.
I’ll say it again—those weren’t the real Undertaker and Noh Do-hwa in the video. In the real featured moment, we were just having meaningless small talk.
But—
「Unexpected as this may seem, Undertaker, I do find your stories about other cycles somewhat interesting...」
「I thought you weren’t interested?」
「For the realism of it, no. But the story where you said I strangled you to death—that one was quite amusing. The important thing, too, is they’re pretty decent getting to understand who you are...」
Between Do-hwa and me, our conversations weren’t just vocal. There was always an unspoken Telepathy of sorts, like a silent signal in the background. Just as the letter ‘G’ in the word sign is never pronounced, our unvoiced signal, this Morse code of our minds, always hummed beneath the surface of our exchanges.
Human relationships are defined not just by what can be said, but also by what is left unsaid. By that measure, Do-hwa and I were particularly strong in our shared silence, like comrades attending a concert, quietly appreciating the faint bass together.
So—
「But there is one thing about your stories I just can’t get out of my head...」
「Only one? That’s a bit disappointing.」
「You never talk about romance...」
In reality, we never had this conversation.
Not ever.
Although neither of us had formally agreed to it, we had an unspoken rule to never cross a certain ‘line.’
Do-hwa strangling me to death? That wasn’t a violation of our unspoken rules. It was just another joke we could laugh off as part of our bizarre shared history.
If anything―
「Huh. I didn’t think Commander Noh Do-hwa would be interested in romantic stories. I’ll keep it in mind for next time.」
「Stop pretending. You know full well that’s not what I mean. Alright, I’ll spell it out so even you can understand. Undertaker, I’m interested in the fact that you never bring up romance.」
「That’s because I’m impotent.」
「Oh. That’s one theory. But since you seem fine to me, I’ll dismiss it.」
That kind of conversation was way beyond the boundary of our usual interactions.
In the video, Do-hwa turned her head to look up at the Undertaker. They were so close that you could almost feel their breath.
「Shall I share my theory then...?」
「......」
「In another cycle, did you ever―」
Click.
Without prompting, both of us reached for the mouse at the same time.
Since I was faster, I clicked on my left hand, and on top of the back of my left hand rested Do-hwa’s palm.
The silence lingered.
Oddly enough, the real Do-hwa was now looking up at me from an angle, just like in the paused frame on the screen.
Maybe that’s why it felt like time in reality had also stopped.
Even though she was an Awakener, Do-hwa’s hair remained a dark black, like mine. Her eyes, too, were the same untouched black. Just like mine.
Black gazing into black.
With both of us locking eyes, it was as though, without words, a silent Morse code was being transmitted.
‘Shall we pretend none of this happened?’
‘......’
‘Or?’
The silence stretched on.
Then, Do-hwa parted her lips.
“I...”
“......”
“No matter how many cycles pass, the way you look at Dang Seo-rin as Dang Seo-rin, or Yu Ji-won as Yu Ji-won, or Lee Ha-yul as Lee Ha-yul... Sometimes, I fucking hate it, but I don’t think it’s a bad thing. It’s what makes you the same person in every cycle, whether it’s your 10th or your 100th run.”
“Yes. I’m aware.”
“The reason it’s fucking annoying is that while you remember everything, I don’t.”
“I know.”
“So, if I can’t know everything, I’d rather hear nothing at all. For you, with your Complete Memory, any story I tell you is just a rerun of something you’ve already seen. That pisses me off. How do others feel about this? Do they always find it fun? Do they always think it’s fresh?”
“I know.”
“You’re such a fucking bastard.”
She grabbed my tie. It wasn’t a yank so much as a clawing motion.
At that moment―
「Do you want to hear my voice?」
Click.
Though neither of us pressed the mouse, the video resumed playing on its own.
「Then save this godforsaken world first. Or, heh. Lose your regression ability. Learn to forget.」
Even so, I couldn’t look away from her. Do-hwa, standing right in front of me, demanded my attention.
And besides, I didn’t need to look.
「Shall I be completely honest with you?」
Whether it was the Noh Do-hwa in the video or the one in front of me, they were both in the exact same position.
「I don’t expect you to save the world. In fact, I expect the opposite.
「Undertaker. I’m the only one who is hoping for your ‘failure.’ Because that seems far more likely. I’m not the type to bet my life on false hope...」
Do-hwa smiled faintly.
「So the day you stand on the same level as me will be the day you give up regression. When you live your final life. That’ll be hell for you. In that final hell, I’ll gladly join you, all the way to the bottom...
「I’m really looking forward to that day. What about you? Don’t you look forward to the moment when your only funeral will also be your only true life, your own personal hell? You can thank me then.
「It’s a pity, you know, that today isn’t the day you’ll fall into that hell.」
Her hand covered my eyes.
Because of that, I couldn’t tell if the final words came from her lips or from the laptop’s speakers.
“Don’t forget...”
The cold touch of her hand, as black as midnight.
Like a snowstorm swallowing the desolate tundra at night, casting a shadow over everything. A faint echo, like the last note of a fading melody, whispered as it disappeared.
“I’ll be waiting for you at your true Bad Ending.”
The next day.
We began the full-fledged process of hunting down the Anomaly.
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