SSS-Class Suicide Hunter
chapter-344

1.

“Indeed.”

After hearing the reason for her summoning, the Count nodded her head.

“In short, it all ends if I just say you passed, doesn’t it? Simple. Easier than adding a slice of cheese to a hamburger.”

“Why is your analogy a hamburger of all things?”

“I’m on a diet right now….”

The Count showed a slightly despairing expression. She looked like a hamster that had just heard a Supreme Court ruling that it’s illegal to nibble on sunflower seeds from now on.

Having never dieted in my life, I found it hard to understand, but it seemed like a very tough day was unfolding for her.

“Why not just simply burn the fat with aura?”

“That kind of nonsense is something only a crazy aura fanatic like you could do, Death King. Keep in mind not all hunters in the world can use aura as brilliantly as you do. What if I burn my insides while trying to burn fat?”

“It’s not that hard though….”

“Enjoy your trickery alone. Now, anyway, I have no reason to oppose. You pass, you pass. Send me back to the first floor already.”

The Count spoke as if she was done with the matter.

However, [The Wand of Ages] shook its head.

“Sorry, but things won’t go that way. You have a duty to observe the Death King as a judge.”

“If I had to pick the worst word I’ve ever heard, it would be ‘duty’. It’s oddly like the responsibility is being shifted not by the one who exercised the power but to the one who was forced to accept it. The worst scammer is not a merchant like me but the language itself.”

“You have a point. Then let me rephrase. Observe. You have no choice but to follow my power.”

“Damn it.”

The Count took out a fan and flicked it through the air, tap, tap. Then, a miraculous thing happened. Out of thin air, poof! A luxurious sofa appeared and settled down.

[‘The Eye Living in the Labyrinth’ informs you that this is the divine power of the Commerce God.]

[‘The Eye Living in the Labyrinth’ says that if you have enough money, you can buy almost anything from the Commerce God.]

The god of commerce, huh.

Like Patricia’s skills were derived from Hishmith Kritz, did the Count receive most of her skills from some unknown Commerce God?

“Good. Very good. Being forced by someone feels so ecstatic that it even makes my life happier. I just want to fulfill my duties while my body is comfortable, but that wouldn’t be a problem, right?”

“That’s your freedom.”

The Count leaned back on the sofa. Shrrr! As the Count unfolded her fan, in addition to the sofa, a soft pillow, a cat plushie, potato chips, wet wipes, and cola were summoned. Moreover, the potato chip bag was already open, and the cola came with a straw in it.

The Count looked at me while crunching on the potato chips.

“What now? Go ahead and run the quest or something. I’ll consider it like watching a movie.”

This is amazing….

“Can’t you use that skill to diet?”

“Would you believe me if I said the money for diet items could be used to buy hair treatment products instead?”

“Uh. It seems like there’s a serious error in pricing…”

“My skill is like that. Sometimes the product prices go crazy. I once bought a product called [World Peace] for only 100 gold, and a message popped up saying [The world was peaceful all along! By realizing this fact, you have become a slightly better person than yesterday!].”

“Wow.”

“If I wasn’t sufficiently rational, I would have torn up the skill card at that moment.”

It’s clear the character of the Commerce God is not right.

“By the way, just asking out of curiosity before sending you off.”

“Yes?”

“I heard the stage you will be in charge of is the 72nd floor. So, someone else was the judge for the 71st floor before me, right? Who was my predecessor?”

“Ah.”

I replied without hesitation.

“It was Patricia.”

“Hooh….”

The Count picked up a potato chip with the logo of a famous mustachioed man and crunch, bit into it. (Ed: Pringles)

“I see.”

The Count’s face showed no particular change in expression.

“This is just out of curiosity as well. Just in case, you know. What happens if the judge does not stamp the pass?”

“Right. What happens then, Mage?”

“You’ll just wander in that stage forever. Simple.”

[The Wand of Ages] said.

“That’s why many hunters give up on challenging further and settle for the previous floors. Honestly, you, Death King, are the odd one out for challenging the upper floors without any worries.”

“Hmm….”

The Count wiped her fingers, which were covered in snack crumbs, with a wet wipe.

“And the judge? I understand that the challenger would be stuck in the stage. But what about the judge who has to watch over it?”

“They also have to stay here as long as the challenger is trapped in the stage.”

“Even if decades pass?”

“Yes. Even if decades pass. However, the flow of time is different for each. If a challenger has to endure 30 years as the full length of 30 years, a judge can use ‘acceleration’ as much as they want. If a challenger is like a director making a movie, then a judge is a critic. A critic doesn’t need to spend the same amount of time it takes to produce a movie just to watch it.”

“So, they can only watch. I see, I see…. Got it.”

Crunch.

“I roughly understand the rules. As long as there are rules, there’s a way. Did you say the world I’m going to is related to [money]?”

“Yes.”

“Then it’s settled. Go forth with ease. If you find a part-time job and earn a wage…. No, even a weekly wage, the results will soon show.”

The Count’s words were not false, I naturally felt that way.

[‘The Wand of Ages’ is transporting you.]

The white ground squelched as it swallowed my feet.

Until the altitude of my gaze matched the level of the ground, the Count stared blankly at my face.

A soft curve formed on the Count’s lips.

“You are a good friend, Death King.”

That was the last thing the Count said.

2.

[You have entered the 72nd stage.]

[You set foot in a place you were originally not supposed to enter.]

[A certain penalty is given.]

I opened my eyes.

The place could be typically envisioned as a ‘Mediterranean seaside village’, the kind of village companies would prefer as a computer boot screen.

Blue and white.

A port of blue and white, as if colors forming the sky were drawn out with a dropper and then planted right onto the ground.

Truly peaceful….

“Selling orange apples! Fresh and crisp orange apples!”

“Try the sweet potato wine brought in from distant Basta Island!”

“Have you heard of Dodeok pig barbecue? It’s incredibly delicious.”

Okay.

There, merely looking at it shaved off one’s sanity, invoking an urge to immediately grab and slit open its belly, tearing out its entrails, was the grilled form of a monster that looked so wicked it made one wonder how it could possibly appear so vile.

This world won’t do. Let’s escape.

[You have not cleared the stage.]

[You cannot voluntarily leave this stage.]

Damn it!

“Snake, quickly explain what this situation is all about.”

“Keeek…”

The Snake gently swayed its tail.

[‘The Eye Living in the Labyrinth’ manifests its power.]

[General information about this stage is revealed to you.]

Amidst the bustling noise of street vendors in the port city, letters fluttered before my eyes.

Hoping for an explanation of the unidentified food items laid out on the street stalls, I read the information with quite a desperate heart.

+

[Gold Heaven World]

Floor: 72nd

Constellation: ‘The Cat that Bit a Gold Coin’

Difficulty: B+~A+

Explanation (Lv.1): This is a world where everything revolves around bargaining. There are no freebies here. There is no such thing as a fixed price. If you want to purchase something, you must bargain with the seller, and the ‘satisfaction’ you feel from this bargaining sustains you.

The nutrients consumed by the residents of this world are satisfaction derived from transactions. The fulfillment of having successfully bargained, having sucked the life out of someone’s back, or having given a sucker an experience of a lifetime fattens them. Conversely, feelings of being duped, tricked, or stabbed in the back will leave you famished.

There is no such thing as a fixed price. It’s the fault of the one who is fooled. Think of it as everything being made through bargaining!

+

What is this.

Hell?

Why is there a living hell instead of heaven?

“Try the orange apples. They’re orange apples. Just one bite, and the juice will burst onto your palate, sticking forever….”

“The essence of wine lies in the sweetness that lingers on the tip of your tongue. For you, sweet potato grape wine offers the perfect experience! Hey, sir. Drink it at ease. No, drink….”

“Dodeok pig. Definitely, Dodeok pig!”

Upon closer inspection, the street vendors’ eyes were bloodshot.

They had the ferocity of soldiers who had fled from battle and starved for two days, seeing nothing.

Scary.

[‘The Eye Living in the Labyrinth’ manifests its power.]

[Exposure]

[You have not met the conditions to acquire hidden information.]

[‘The Eye Living in the Labyrinth’ forcibly satisfies the conditions!]

[Hidden information is revealed!]

But fear stems from ignorance. Hishmith Kritz quickly updated the information, and secrets that a normal hunter could never access were revealed right from the start.

+

[Gold Heaven World]

Floor: 72nd

Constellation: ‘The Cat that Bit a Gold Coin’

Difficulty: B+~A

Explanation (Lv.2): This is one of the afterlives prepared in the tower.

Explanation (Lv.3): Gold Heaven. For those who do not want to believe there is anything in this world besides money, for those who fear that if there were, their entire life would be invalidated, for those who hope their life is not invalidated to the extent they wish to buy their place in the afterlife with money.

Even for them, heaven is granted.

Here, they need not ponder about the world. Everything is clear. You do not need to become a cold human being to deny morals. There is no reason to be criticized for refusing to understand others. As they wished, as they desired, only transactions exist here. Like all heavens, Gold Heaven welcomes you.

Do not agonize. Do not worry.

Die as you have lived.

You have the right to do so.

You will trade to be satisfied. All you need to worry about is your daily bread. You may tire of the daily grind, but if there’s no other world beyond the wheel, then there’s no reason to tire at all.

May eternal labor comfort your soul.

+

“…….”

For a moment, a chill ran down my neck.

‘A place that is heaven for some is hell for others. But this place is the opposite.’

It was not surprising that there were people who considered this place heaven. Not at all.

The reason I felt chilled was the fact that a realm of the afterlife had been created for [those who consider such a place heaven].

‘Tower Master.’

Determined not to lose even a single soul.

Such a nearly cursed determination was what I felt.

What kind of heavens have been built on the remaining seven floors?

‘…No. Focus.’

I shook my head to clear the distracting thoughts.

‘Right now, it’s important to receive the Count’s pass stamp. Yes. That’s the immediate task.’

I refreshed my mood.

The condition set by the Count was to earn money, whether through part-time work or otherwise.

The type of job didn’t matter.

“Hey, you….”

It was when I was about to start looking for work.

Among the street vendors, someone who had just spread out a mat called out to me. It was a message carried by aura, and the voice was so precisely targeted at my ears that there was no mistaking who it was intended for.

“Yes?”

“Judging by your appearance, you’re a [challenger], aren’t you? I’m right, aren’t I? Your eyes are too bright, not like those of a soul that has forgotten its past life….”

The person was hiding their face with a hood. Before I could even respond, the hooded man said with a somewhat breathless voice.

“How about it? I’m a challenger just like you. Would you buy advice from a senior who fell into this damned world 300 years before you… for a small amount of money…?”

*****