The Abandoned Empress
chapter-190

“Sure, Your Majesty.”

“No, I can’t talk with her here at the temple. I think I have to move to the Imperial Palace. ”

“…I got it, Your Majesty.”

“Thank you.”

Huh? What does he want to talk to me about? Is it related to what he was going to say, but couldn’t because of Jiun at the cemetery?

I was a little sorry for my father who seemed puzzled and reluctant, but once I bowed my head to my father, then headed out of the temple with him.

Time already passed quickly, and it was quite dark outside. Although I was bothered by the fact that it was too late, I couldn’t retract my decision to go with him.

‘I guess everything will be alright.’

I swallowed a sigh and got on the wagon waiting outside.

How much time passed?

The wagon ran smoothly and arrived at the Imperial Palace, then passed through the main entrance and stopped in front of the Central Palace, where the late emperor used to reside. When I saw the towering palace, I murmured unconsciously, ‘He seems to have already moved in.’

Somehow, he looked a bit gloomy. Maybe he might not have felt good about moving to the Central Palace, his late father’s place, as soon as the state funeral was over.

I felt a bit sorry for him, but I silently headed to the library with him.

At first glance, the study of the Central Palace seemed much larger than that of the crown prince’s palace, but now I couldn’t afford to appreciate it.

I watched him who was remaining silent all along, and opened my mouth carefully.

I thought I had better say something to him first now.

“Your Majesty. Well… Would you like a cup of tea? ”

“Um. Is it okay for you to have tea? ”

“Oh, for that matter, I am fine.”

Since I was poisoned by tea, some people around me began to feel very sensitive to tea.

At first my father told me he was concerned, then Carsein and now the emperor began to feel anxious.

After shaking my head lightly, I pulled the string and asked a maid to bring a tea set.

Shortly afterwards, the maid who came in and displayed all kinds of tea with tea pots.

I picked lavender from among them. Although I knew he didn’t like the strong scent, I thought that lavender with a neuro-stable effect might soothe him, who was somewhat unstable now.

But he put down the teacup on the table after lifting it. Didn’t he like it?

“As I felt you needed stability, I brewed it strong… Should I make it again?”

“Oh, no, you don’t have to…”

I tilted my head. Why did he put down the teacup if it were not for the strong scent?”

When I raised my cup with an anxious look, I suddenly saw his hand holding the mug trembling.

I stopped putting the mug to my mouth. I thought he felt a little better because he was calm, but he didn’t. Is it because he recalled his late father when he came back to the Central Palace?

As I felt sorry, I put down the mug quietly. When he was carefully choosing words to comfort him, he hesitantly opened his mouth after pondering over something.

“… Aristia. ”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

“In fact, I want you to do me a favor.”

“What is it?” I looked at him with a puzzled expression. Why is he so hesitant?

When I was waiting for his reply with a bit of anxiety, he said, looking at me, as if he made up his mind, “If I am alone here… I think it will be too hard for me to endure tonight. So…”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

“Would you stay with me tonight?”

“Pardon?” I asked, startled.

But he had no answer. I was just staring at me with deeply subdued eyes.

“Your Majesty…”

At that instant my memories of the past flashed through my mind. When I looked at it with my trembling eyes, I saw myself reflected in his dark, sunken eyes: wide open eyes, my face that turned white, and terrified look.

He said with a sigh, while staring at me, who freaked out.

“…I don’t have any intention of sleeping with you as you have not come of age yet. Besides, today we have no idea what to do with you who haven’t even come of age yet. Besides, the state funeral was today.”

“Ah… . ”

“I said that because I just wanted you to stay with me, though I knew I was forcing you…”

When I barely calmed down my pounding heart, I saw him staring at me with an unstable expression.

Suddenly, I felt sorry because I hurt his feelings, who was going through a hard time now.

But it was obvious that I would be talked about in social circles if I stayed with him tonight.

What can I do? What should I do?

I closed my eyes tightly. Although I knew I would be in trouble if something went wrong, I could not refuse his request. I knew he would crumble if I left him alone. Besides, I had to tell him about the late emperor a little more. There were only a few who experienced the late emperor’s affection for him, and I was one of them. Perhaps I was the only one who could tell him.

When I got up with a sigh, he looked agitated.

He said with a subdued voice, “I knew you would refuse…”

“Your Majesty, I would like to walk in the garden with you.”

“Oh, I see…”

“The weather is good these days, so I think it would be good if you took a walk at night.

What do you think?”

“…Thank you. ” He whispered to me. He got up and reached out to me.

I was escorted to the garden.

The imperial palace garden shrouded in darkness had a charm of its own, different from what I saw during the day. As we passed the arched door decorated with wisteria and entered the promenade, various colorful flowers greeted us. Under the moonlight, the flowers waved gently in the wind. The scent of flowers tickled the tip of my nose in the spring breeze and disappeared.

Walking silently while hearing the sounds of bugs, he said, “Is your condition okay now?”

“Yes, Your Majesty. It’s been four months since I got up from the bed. I’m going back to the knights sooner or later.”

“Well, your father submitted an application for your transfer. He asked me to transfer you to the 2nd Knights. ”

“Did my father?”

“Didn’t you know? I think he felt uneasy because you experienced it at the 1st Knights’ Division.”

Only now did I know that. I thought I would return to the 1st Knights if I recovered. But I felt it might be better for me to be transferred to the 2nd Knights because they might have selected a replacement for my position as the captain’s aide.

‘Well, can I go to work with my father from now on?’

He looked at me, smiling gently, and said, “It’s rare to see noble family members having a solid family bond, but you must be very close to your father.”

“Ah… ”

“It was surprising. As you know, your father was always blunt, so I never thought he loved you so much. Well, I now know why he used to be called the romanticist of the century.”

I was surprised. Although the way he spoke to me was still the same, he was obviously envious of my father.

Suddenly, I was reminded of myself who realized my father’s love at the last minute before my return when I saw the emperor still failing to realize the late emperor’s deep affection for him even though he actually received it.

When I think about it now, my father at the time loved me even though he didn’t express it. Of course, I didn’t realize it out of self-accusation at that time.

“In fact, I wasn’t close to my father at first.”

“Really?”

Only

“Yes, Your Majesty. I once thought my father didn’t love me because he was blunt and reticent.

So I always kept a cold relationship with him.

“But how are you so close to him now?”

When I was pondering over how to say, a familiar road came into my view before I knew it. When I saw the white flower tree shining brightly under the moonlight, something suddenly came to my mind. ‘Is the silver flower blooming now?’

I was very curious about it, but I continued, without caring about it further, “One day, I had a nightmare. I felt very lonely and empty. I felt as if I was left alone in the world. So I reached out to him.”

“… ”

“And only then did I realize that although he didn’t reveal it, he always loved me. ”

“…. ”