The Darkness was Comfortable for me
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chapter-25
Light
Dark
TLN: Double chapter today! Make sure you didn’t miss the ~.
I lined up the contents of the bulky coin bag on top of the table of the cheap inn that’s full of holes.(10…20…28, huh…) (Hikaru)
28 small silver coins.
I try my best to use all the copper coins, so I would say I have around ten of those in a different coin bag.
(I should pay for the cost of next week’s stay, and for the food and everything else, I can barely manage at my current pace, huh…) (Hikaru)
It has been around 10 days since I came to this dungeon city. I have no leeway at all in money.
I am diving into the dungeon everyday for the sake of my livelihood, but even though there are times when I come out with a profit, there’s also times when I come with no profit at all or a minus. It on average is a plus, but for a job that has dangers involved, the returns are low.
I may be selling the equipment of the dead explorers, but it is not like I find those the whole time.Most of it came from the Spirit Stones that would be dropped there every now and then.
Maybe because the one buying it from me is from the black market, I feel like they are buying them for cheap, but it can’t be helped.
I am still in a state of mind where I can’t proactively interact with others.
(There’s also the option of leaving the inn and renting a room though…) (Hikaru)
That method should be better in the long term.
This is a city of explorers. There should be apartments for explorers.
But even if I were to actually rent one, me staying in an inn right now is most likely helping me omit a lot of extra steps.
For food, there’s as many food carts as needed, but there’s also washing my clothes, preparing the hot water, and furniture. I might have to pay a security deposit first before I can rent a room.
Putting it as an objective sounds like an idea, but it sounds difficult in my current situation. Also, I don’t have a reason to actively pursue living alone.
“More importantly, I have to earn more…” (Hikaru)
In the end, it is all about money.
I can’t survive without money. It would be another story if I could have a self-sufficient life, but I didn’t choose that.
I decided to live in the darkness.
“…Status open.” (Hikaru)
When I say this, a half-transparent window like those of a computer game appeared in front of me.
Since coming to this city, I have only been checking the Status Board once every few days.
Even though I want to forget about Earth.
…No, that’s why I couldn’t go against the desire of knowing whether the real time viewers have decreased.
I could get a variety of information from the Status Board.
A number of entries have increased since the time the isekai transfer started.
[Real Time Viewers: 42,000,000].
[Total Views: 6,280,000,000].
[Favorited: 1,460,000,000].
[Total Crystals Obtained: 49].
[Total Points Obtained: 7].
[Number of Chosen: 723/1,000].
[Crystals in possession: 21].
[Points in possession: 5].
My number of viewers has decreased quite a lot compared to before.
Even so, the number is still really high.
I have spent almost all my time in the darkness for several days, or if I am not, I would just be sleeping in the inn. There has been nothing interesting going on.
…That’s how it should have been.
“Damn it…” (Hikaru)
There’s still 40 million viewers.
It is like this even in real time. I am going over 1 billion views even now on the constant.
It seems like more than 200 of the Chosen have died, so the attention gathering to the ones that are still alive must be increasing because of this.
Just the act of surviving alone is increasing the attention I gather.
I close the window and sigh.
(Well, even with that, there have been results. Let’s do this slowly.) (Hikaru)
No matter how I live, I don’t think my current lifestyle is fine.
So I say, but I can’t find anything to pursue life proactively.
I don’t want to use my points and crystals as much as possible.
I can also exchange points for cash, but I don’t want to do that.
You could say this is a bit of a rebellious spirit towards the God that cornered me into this situation.
(I will sleep for today and think about the future tomorrow.) (Hikaru)
It may be a cheap inn, but a private room is expensive.
There’s the option of sleeping together with others in a cheap big room, but that’s impossible for me.
There’s the side that I am worried about the eyes of others, and there’s also the side of that room being a gathering of rowdy big men. I would rather sleep outdoors than sleep in that big room.
Normally, a private room for an explorer of my level is too soon. Moreover, using a private room by yourself instead of with your party would normally be done by explorers on mid rank, or you would have to be a weirdo.
You could say this is my only luxury in this parallel world and my selfishness.
Even now, I still feel gazes on me when I come out from the dungeon.
I feel as if the laughs resonate from somewhere.
Even so, I still have to survive tomorrow and the day after.
I burrow myself into my bed.
Despite being a cheap inn, it is still a plenty enough comfortable bed.
The mattress is filled up with a mix of cotton-like, hair-like, feather-like, and straw-like stuff. I feel like insects could come out at any moment from this, but I put my confidence in Poison Resistance and Disease Resistance, and decided to not worry about it.
(Let’s wake up at midnight and dive into the dungeon again…) (Hikaru)
I think this with my hazy mind, set the alarm, and close my eyes.
Just when I was at the point where I was going to fall asleep, *knock knock* the sound of knocking interrupted my sleep.
There’s no person who would come ask for me.
If there is, it would be a worker of the inn.
You have to pay in advance, so there should be no issues…
I squeeze out strength to pull myself up, and open the creaking door.
“Oh my~. You are quite cute. Are you alone?”
The one standing there was a red-haired woman with alluring red clothes that I could only call thin.
There was someone like this working at the inn?
“I am alone…” (Hikaru)
“I see. Then, you have a room all for yourself? Hmmm…your body is clean as well. Are you maybe a rich boy from a good household…?”
The woman glares all over my body as if analyzing me, or as if appraising me.
And then, she takes one step closer.
“How about it? One night. You are a new customer, so I will make it cheap.”
At first, I didn’t understand what she meant.
The woman bent her body seductively as she waited for my answer, but I couldn’t even speak.
One night…? Make it cheap…?
“Right, if it is you…I am fine with 2 silver coins.”
One more step.
She closed the distance to me and smiled bewitchingly.
The woman didn’t clearly say who she was, for what reason she is here, and what the 2 silver coins are for.
In other words, it is something that she doesn’t have to say out loud to understand.
She is a beauty.
Her hair hanging down from her back was slightly wavy, and her body below her thin clothes were different from a man’s, they were fascinating and curvaceous to the point that my eyes ended up gravitating there.
I have never had a girlfriend before.
That’s normal for a first year highschooler, but I had no other female friend aside from Nanami, and we had more of a sibling relationship.
My two little sisters are 3 years apart from me. Their brains are on a different dimension, but when at home, they are complete mischievous children.
I wouldn’t really say that’s the reason why, but I am lacking in experience to deal with a situation like this.
I could just refuse her flatly.
That’s all I need to do, and yet, I am letting out pathetic ‘ah ah’ noises and getting flustered.
I have never had a moment with a woman where I have been at such a short distance our noses might touch.
That’s why, even when the woman grabbed my right wrist, I could only stand there allowing her to do as she wished.
And then, she pushed my hand to her breast just like that…
“Ahn! How is it? I am pretty confident, you know?”
“Ah…Uh…”
It was as if a bolt had run through my body.
That softness that I haven’t experienced before, on top of the warmth of a person that I haven’t felt for so long, was shaking my brain.
“Fufu…you don’t have experience, huh… So cute.”
With my hand still pushed on her breast, she closes in with her body to the point that we were practically hugging.
Her breath brushing my cheek.
The warmth of a living human I can feel with my whole body.
I am most likely standing completely vertical like a statue, my face is red like a tomato, and I must be showing a pretty pathetic sight.
Right, it was the moment I could clearly view myself calmly.
—Ahaha.
—Kyakkya.
I heard laughing.
At the same time as that, I felt piercing gazes of curiosity.
People from around the world are watching me.
How I -the person that killed his childhood friend- am on the verge of falling to the wiles of an isekai prostitute.
They are looking forward to it.
1 billion viewers are.
—How I get all overwhelmed by the temptations of the prostitute.
—How I get all the silver coins from my purse pathetically taken away.
—How I would get all entranced in her breasts.
—How I would finish in an instant and let out a dry laugh with a red face.
“L-Let go!” (Hikaru)
“Kya!”
I suddenly pushed her away.
She fell on her butt to the outside of the door.
I felt bad about that and hesitated for an instant there, but I closed the door and secured the bolt lock.
“Hah?! You broke virgin!”
I heard the sound of the door being kicked together with insults, and then I heard the stomping footsteps of the prostitute leaving.
—Kusukusu.
—Ahahahaha.
The light leaking from the corridor was gone, and the room was now closed inside darkness.
Someone was laughing at me.
They were laughing, saying ‘you were acting like a lone wolf, but you actually yearned for the warmth of others, huh’.
I do yearn for it.
Those are my true feelings.
I didn’t have the resolve at all.
I am 15 years old.
A student that hasn’t even properly thought about his future.
And here I am, in a parallel world where I don’t know anyone. There’s no way I wouldn’t feel lonely.
“Uuh… Damn it… Damn it…” (Hikaru)
I felt as if my true feelings that I had hidden within the darkness have been exposed, and I felt tears welling up.
Even this sight of mine must be a joyful moment for the viewers.
Even my crying face will be consumed as content.
The more I think about that, the more my tears flowed.
“Guuh… Why…? Stop it… Damn it… Damn it…” (Hikaru)
I don’t like this.
These feelings are my own.
There’s no way people who are just watching from the outside with their safety assured would be able to understand these feelings. I don’t want them to make faces as if they understand me.
Then, I am fine with them holding that misunderstanding.
I prefer that over being understood. It is several times better.
“…[Darkness Fog].” (Hikaru)
My Spirit Energy changes to a fog of darkness, and it covers my body.
The room where light can’t reach was now covered in complete darkness.
Inside the darkness is the only space where I can feel safe.
Darkness…
My complaints.
My tears.
My weakness.
Please mask them all.
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