Villain Retirement
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chapter-469-30041322
"I truly had no idea that you liked feces that much, Miss Hera."
"Let it go."
"I am not disgusted by many things, but I would never touch and even try to put feces near my face."
"..."
"As my sister used to say, no matter how beautiful it is, a poop is still a poo—""I said let it go!"
"I am not holding onto anything to let go, Miss Hera."
"You—"
An hour already passed, and the two were now seated in front of what seemed to be a local restaurant in the city. Although nothing was really working for Hera at the moment, at the very least, she wanted to taste the local cuisine—if it was bad, then so be it.
Not many could say they have tasted food from lightyears away. And besides, her body could handle it. As for Riley… if he gets poisoned here, then the entire universe would be better for it.
…But would it, really?
Of course, it would. Hera glanced at Riley; her thoughts, for some reason, slightly jumbled."Did you order a feces meal, Miss Hera? I would understand if you will. I, for one, will not partake."
"You should just die, you know that?"
"Some things are just not… attainable, Miss Hera."
And as the two were casually having a conversation, they were finally served the food. And contrary to their expectations, there were no unnecessary tentacles or food that looked out of the ordinary— in fact, one could even say that if this was served to them back on Earth, they wouldn't even think something was different about it.
Hera ordered some sort of steak made with a mystery meat… and it just looked like a steak. Riley ordered whatever the server from earlier recommended, it just looked like a regular stew lamb; if not under garnished.
"Well, this is kinda boring," Hera let out a small sigh as she took a bite of the steak… and it just tasted like steak, "How does yours taste?"
"Underseasoned and bland, Miss Hera. Perhaps we should just buy ingredients and I can cook it."
"Hm, still…" Hera then grabbed the Teera X120, trying to flip and swipe through its contents until her face popped up in front of it. And with a shrug, she took a photo of herself and the food.
"That… has a camera on it?"
"It's basically a smartphone you can't use to call," Hera shrugged as she deleted the photo and took another one. With her hands twice as large as they were before because of the transformation, she found it hard to press the device properly.
"Interesting."
The two finished their food after half an hour, before finally deciding to explore the bustling city once more. But after another half an hour of doing so, they found out there truly wasn't anything else to see.
"You think we can buy one of those flying cars?" Hera then said as she looked at the busy sky.
"Why not just ask father to build you one, Miss Hera?"
"...Right."
Hera finally realized why she wasn't really fazed by any of the alien's technology. It was because of Whiteking—a human that could probably build a car more advanced than anything she had seen here with a box of toothpicks.
"Your dad, are we sure he doesn't have any powers?"
"He does now, Miss Hera. He swallowed a Guardian Force."
"...What the fuck's a guardian for—"
"Move! Move!"
And before the two could peacefully continue their conversation, a crowd of people suddenly rushed past them— all going in the same direction.
"..." Hera and Riley looked at each other for a few seconds, before just nodding and following the crowd. And soon, they saw them gathered in some sort of plaza with a large hologram projection right at the very center.
"What does it say, Miss Hera?"
"...Bounties," Hera said as she read the letters circling at the center of the plaza. She had read enough of the planet's most used language to understand them—another quirk of her abilities.
And soon, a 3D image of a person from another race popped up.
"Maybe we should go back to the ship, Riley."
"It is fine, Miss Hera. Even if I appear there, I am completely covered in a cloak," Riley shook his head, "And I think it would be valuable for us to know the villains of the Universe, no?"
"...Hm," Hera nodded as the two continued to check the hologram. Hera glanced at the crowd from time to time, only to see them with excited looks on their faces,
"...Being a bounty hunter seems to be a popular occupation in space… and entertainment."
"I think so too, Miss Hera," Riley nodded, "Even the one that tried to attack me before mother's ship left us belonged to a bounty—"
And before Riley could finish his words, his image finally popped up in the plaza. And as soon as it did so, the whispers and murmurs of the crowd became louder.
"Who's that?"
"Do you live in the Unknown or something? That's the newcomer!"
"...A newcomer is in the Top 100?"
"How is that even possible!?"
"I haven't even heard of him. Is he an Evaniel? Why would an Evaniel even be an outlaw?"
"Stupid tentacles, he's from the Unknown."
And as the whispers of the people became louder and louder, Hera was also starting to get a worrisome feeling. And very soon, she knew why—
"Top 100…" Riley whispered as he looked at his image, "...I'm only in the Top 100?"
"Please don't get any ideas," Hera said as she grabbed Riley's arm, "We should go."
"1.5F, what does it mean?" Riley, however, did not budge a single millimeter from his spot as he looked at the symbol on top of his hologram.
And almost as if the crowd heard him, they also started focusing on his bounty.
"1.5F… Imagine getting that. You could buy your own moon and live there alone."
"You? You can't even hunt a grunt, how do you expect to hunt a Galactic-level Threat?"
"Galactic— I'm sure that's exaggerated. Even in the top 10, only 5 are Galactic-level Threats. How can someone from the 80s even—"
"Because he was caught."
"What? Then why is he still posted?"
"Because they said they only caught a clone. I heard it took a Guardian from the Higher Race to even subdue him."
"..." Riley quickly turned his focus toward the people that were talking about him. And he didn't even need to ask any questions… as gossip seemed to be a universal thing.
"Is that for real? So they have him in the Phantom Zone?"
"No idea. I heard they're still keeping him locked somewhere, most probably to lure the original body or something."
"...Where do you even hear these things?"
"Wait, if the one rampaging around was just a clone…
…then how strong is the original body?"
"..." Riley listened in on the conversation for a few more seconds, before just shrugging and turning his focus back to the rankings. Whether his clone was captured or not, Riley already gave him free rein— it was up to his clone what happens next.
The crowd quieted down as the rankings went on. But soon, the light from the hologram became brighter; the image, almost doubling in size, and with it, the crowd once again started to make noise.
"It's the Top 10," Hera whispered; her eyes also focused on the hologram. As she continued to watch, she realized one thing— the villains of Earth were just a speck of dust compared to the threats of the Known Universe.
For some reason, though, she felt something. She knew she shouldn't feel it, but she felt somewhat proud. She knew it was fucked up, but seeing Riley Ross in the Top 100 felt… good.
It was good to know that the villain that terrorized Earth as a Calamity is in the Top 100 of the most heinous criminals in the Universe. It made her incompetence and the incompetence of the other heroes seem… not so incompetent.
"That looks like Bulwark, Miss Hera."
"Hm?" Hera then snapped out of her thoughts as she looked at the hologram, only to see a gold-skinned humanoid sitting at the Top 5 of the rankings,
"I knew that dude was an alie—Oh, no. That guy only has one eye."
"2.25K," Riley squinted his eyes as he looked at the bounty on top of the outlaw that looked like Bulwark, "I don't like this feeling, Miss Hera. I am used to being on the top."
"I… didn't take you for someone that cared about things like that," Hera squinted her eyes as she glanced at Riley.
"Hm," Riley only hummed in response as he continued to look at the rankings.
The one sitting at the top 4 belonged to a race familiar to Riley—Elder Zora's kin.
The top 3 was another humanoid, and based on the crowd's sudden cheering, he was quite famous.
"It's Kerrigan!"
"Kerrigan! The Bounty Hunter King!"
"Last I heard, he just came back from the Unknown to try and search for something. What do you..."
"A bounty hunter is Top 3?" Hera blinked a couple of times as she heard the crowd, "That's weirdly ironic as hell."
The crowd's cheers, however, did not last long as the hologram panned to the next outlaw. Perhaps the fact that there was no image at all of the Top 2 contributed to that.
"Caitlin'Ur…" Hera squinted her eyes as she whispered the name of the outlaw, "That sounds… awfully familiar. Why don't they even have an image? Does that mean they don't even know what the dude looks li-"
"Oh, that's mother."
"...What?"