Florida Man's General Store in Cultivation World
chapter-302

Chapter 302 – Touching Reunion? Florida Man Found His Missing Father, Got Scolded for Not Inheriting His DNA.

After Priscilla had gone, Leo dryly laughed and scratched his head. From the very beginning, he could tell that Priscilla was a lot stronger than Sieg as he couldn't even scan or measure her cultivation base.

He was relieved and confused. Judging from the conversation, the giant woman harbored no ill intent against Leo. On the contrary, she seemed to be his ally.

"When did I meet that woman? I ain't a protagonist in a novel. I never saved a son or a daughter of a super expert. Also, I don't remember having more than one mother… Or did my freaking father cheat mother?! That bastard!"

He stood there for an hour, cursing and yelling at his father.

…

Meanwhile, Aslan had been waiting for Leo in the dreadnaught mothership.

Earlier, he navigated the ship away from the floating cloud continent to give space for Leo and Priscilla to meet and talk. After Priscilla was gone, Aslan stayed with the ship, thinking of various excuses.

"ACHOOO!"

Even though Aslan was a golem, he could sneeze. After blowing his nose, the fisherman golem broke a sweat.

"What is he doing over there alone? Does his schizo act up again?"

Sometimes, Aslan was concerned about Leo's mental stability as the latter showed symptoms of a mental patient with ADHD, Schizophrenia, or autism. However, in many instances, Leo exhibited traits of OCD whenever he was alone.

Taking care of a weird son could be handy. Aslan deeply sighed and prayed that Leo could be normal one day.

…

After swearing and cussing his father enough, Leo resumed collecting silver sand from the cloud continent. He also grabbed the wet sticky fate crystal ball to examine it.

As soon as Leo touched the crystal ball, it transformed into a streak of light and entered Leo's body. It traveled into his dantian universe and merged with his soul.

As soon as the true entity fate crystal merged with his soul, it reformed the order and reshaped his soul physique.

"Eh?"

Leo could also feel the changes in his body and soul. He remembered the feeling as he once sensed it in the past.

It felt the same when Leo first obtained the alien ring.

DING

<Congratulations. Your soul has absorbed a True Entity Fate Crystal.>

<All system functions are now available.>

<Your system functions can no longer be influenced by external forces and other fate crystals.>

<You are now qualified to participate in the Karmic Ascension forces and other fate crystals.>

<You are now qualified to participate in the Karmic Ascension Event!>

<Due to the changes of ownership, the PVP systems and quest systems will be adjusted.>

<Error! Fate Stadium Not Found!>

<Removing PVP system…>

<Rebalancing quest system…>

"Err…"

Leo stared at the series of system messages in shock. He stroked his chin and whistled.

"Wow. Jackpot! Thanks, Mom! I love you now! Also, thanks, dad! The second mom rocks! You should have introduced me to your second wife earlier!"

Leo cackled and rubbed his hands. He immediately navigated his system menus to find a button to return home.

Unfortunately, the PVP system menu was removed. The 'Return Home' button no longer existed.

"FUUUUUUUUUUUU!!"

Realizing the changes, Leo collapsed to the ground, completing the OTL meme pose. He shed a tear of regret and desperation.

He wasn't worried about returning home. It was something else.

"How am I gonna complete my quests from now on? I need to fight one more PVP match to end the PHASE quests! What am I gonna do?!"

While Leo was screaming, the system finished updating Leo's systems.

DING

<Patching completed. New Phase Quests have been updated!>

<Please read the patch note for more information.>

Leo stopped making noise. He silently stood up and stared at the system screen with a hardened expression. While mimicking one of the Fist of the North Star characters' faces, Leo reopened his system menu to check the patch note.

A few minutes later, Leo's expression brightened. He chortled like Agent Smith in Matrix.

.

.

Six hours later, Rain Dragon Dreadnaught Mothership

Aslan was bored waiting for Leo. He warmed up his throat and prepared to send a sound transmission to his son.

As Aslan was about to speak, Leo directly teleported into the dreadnaught ship. He appeared in front of Aslan.

Upon seeing Aslan again, Leo widely grinned and spoke in a second voice.

"Oh, hi."

Aslan had a bad feeling about this. He knew that nothing good would come whenever Leo started talking in a high-pitched voice.

"Welcome back, master."

"Yup. It's good to be back." Leo widely grinned. He then patted Aslan's shoulders several times. "IT'S GREAT TO SEE YOU AGAIN! HAHAHAHAHA!!"

"…"

Aslan was not amused. He doubted why Leo was behaving this way.

Exploiting the perk of being Leo's subordinate, he sent a wisp of his consciousness to infiltrate Leo's mind to read his memory.

But as soon as he did, he ran into a problem.

.

In the sea of Leo's consciousness, Aslan found the array that he had planted to protect Leo's soul from being attacked by external entities. Cracks and traces of usage riddled the dome barrier.

Aslan frowned. He remembered that the barrier only activated once. However, the current barrier array looked like it had been through wars.

'What the hell happened here? Did he do something to the array? Or was Eleanor stronger than I estimated?'

Confused, Aslan approached the array and touched it.

CRACK

The barrier let out a rainbow lightning bolt and attacked Aslan!

"!!!"

Aslan narrowly dodged the lightning bolt, but the fragment of his consciousness almost died. He looked at the thunderbolt and turned his gaze at the barrier array in disbelief.

It had been tampered with by someone!

"Not good. Leo's mind and soul have been infiltrated. But who could have… Shit. It's my fault, huh.'

Aslan smacked his forehead while he gazed into the transparent dome. As he looked further, he found a rainbow fireball in the middle of the array.

That fireball was the signature flame of rainbow phoenixes. It was also Leo's origin of power, which Aslan had secretly implanted in Leo's physical body 50,000 years ago.

'No one tampered with this barrier. Priscilla didn't do it. That flame belongs to Leo. But how did he move it? I don't remember teaching him about the flame.'

Baffled, Aslan flew around the dome to see if he could learn something from the phoenix flame in Leo's sea of consciousness. It didn't take long for Aslan to notice the source of these changes.

At the bottom of the fireball, there was a thread of karma string. It connected Leo's soul with the core of the phoenix fireball and the barrier array. Moreover, the soul of Leo in the sea of consciousness formed a clear crystal shape similar to entity fate crystals.

Seeing the crystalized soul, Aslan understood everything. He shook his head and laughed.

"I didn't expect Priscilla to actually hand over a true entity fate crystal easily. I thought she would have taken everything back. I guess I called the right person for the job."

Aslan was no longer worried. The fragment of his soul left Leo's sea of consciousness.

.

Meanwhile, Leo gazed at Aslan's face. He narrowed his eyes and uttered.

"Identity."

Aslan who just returned his soul fragment from Leo's mind heard the word. He was taken aback.

"What did you say?"

Leo ignored Aslan and looked at the semi-transparent screen in front of him.

.

Name: Aslan Ariel

Alias: Kitten

Race: Soul Golem (Divine Elf)

Cultivation Base: Entity

Thoughts: Shocked, Concerned.

System Note: He's your father. Treat him nicely.

.

Leo deeply sighed and nodded in approval. He found the new features useful.

"Alright, my dear subordinate. I would like to hear your confession right now, but I want to go home ASAP. Can you bring me home? I miss my wife and my shopping mall. I have a lot of work to do."

Aslan came back to his senses. He continued pretending to be Leo's loyal henchman, "As you wish, master."

Leo raised his hand and lightly karate-chopped Aslan's head.

"Another order, could you stop calling me 'Master'? I don't want to hear it from your mouth."

Aslan was surprised. He lightly patted his head as the smack was neither painful nor light – It was enough to make him dizzy.

"What should I be calling you, then?"

Leo gargled his saliva and spat on the ground like an elderly Asian man. He then sat at the captain's seat and inclined on his chair.

"Okay, let's be real, dad. How long are you going to continue playing dumb?"

"…"

Aslan's expression turned stiff. He cleared his throat and asked his son.

"What did you just call me?"

"Didn't you hear me… DAD?"

"…"

Despite being a stone golem, tears dripped from Aslan's eyes. He celebrated, "You finally figure it out. I'm so proud of you. Finally, you graduate from being an autistic baby to a dumb boy."

"Oi!"

"We should celebrate! Let's have a party when we return!"

"OI!"

Leo widened his eyes and stared at his father. Aslan's reaction was not what Leo had expected.

"What do you mean 'Autistic Baby'?! Do you think I'm retarded?!"

Aslan snorted and berated Leo, "I told you many times that I'm your goddamn father, but you never believed me. How else should I evaluate you? A smartass jackshit? A dumb little shit? A moron who can't cook for shit?"

"HEY! What the hell?! Is that something a father should say to his filial son?!"

"Filial my ass. You caused so many problems that I had to wipe your ass every time! How do you think you survived that shit, huh? Who do you think I visited and groveled to save your life, huh?"

"…"

"Listen, you dumb duck. Now that you realize who I am, you'd better watch your language from now on! I want you to end your sentences with SIR every time you address me!"

"…I should have pretended not to notice."

"Too late, moron. Now, keep calling me DADDY! No more spoiling for you!"

"..."

Leo regretted exposing Aslan's secret. He wished he remained silent.