Turning
chapter-446

Yuder reached out to caress Kishiar's cheek, as if guided by his emotions. The man caught Yuder's wrist and buried his face in the palm of Yuder's hand. Lips that grazed the cheek hesitated for a moment when they touched the tip of a thin glove but soon parted to nibble lightly on the fabric's edge.

The moment a small piece of cloth fell to the floor, the flickering emotions in Yuder's eyes revealed themselves as dark as pitch but remarkably clear.

With a defiant grin, Kishiar kissed the revealed fingers and the crimson stains that had randomly colored his knuckles. Yuder could vividly feel, through his own skin, lips filled with intense desire and joy tracing a curvaceous line upwards.

In a moment of unintended reflex, Yuder's hand clenched, and a wave of warmth rushed from the depths of his belly. Yuder hastily pressed his lips back onto the lips of the man holding his hand. Kishiar gladly received the kiss, steadying Yuder to prevent him from falling forward.

Their lips eventually parted amidst heavy breaths, and an alluring, excited voice flowed out.

"Tell me more."

Anything is good, just more.

As if enchanted by that call, Yuder knelt in front of Kishiar and rested his forehead against the man's tightly embraced shoulder.

"I don't know how this connection between Commander and myself came to be. What power it holds, I also don't know. You said you can't remember the dreams... perhaps someday through that, you'll come to know more."

"Are you afraid of it?"

Yuder remained silent, forehead still resting on the shoulder, then responded with a barely audible voice.

"If it was before, I would have said no. But now, I am afraid."

"Shall we find a way to sever it?"

The counter-question momentarily halted Yuder's breath.

"Would it alleviate your fear a little if I swear never to look for any more information about this bond between us?"

Kishiar would find a way to sever the unseen bond and he swore not to dig any deeper concerning Yuder.

It was an irresistibly sweet offer, yet Yuder couldn't bring himself to reply.

He knew Kishiar would keep that promise the moment he nodded. But Yuder also knew better than anyone that all his fears wouldn't simply vanish by agreeing.

The secrets that twisted like thorny fruit peels within Yuder Aile would never disappear as long as he lived. Every time he looked at Kishiar while living this life, they would without fail scream and leap.

Such was the price for being so deeply enamored with the presence before him.

"No."

Drawing in the unique scent emanating from Kishiar's sturdy nape, Yuder reiterated.

"It won't be."

"That's difficult."

Kishiar chuckled as he stroked Yuder's back. Yuder felt that touch, kept silent for a moment, then spoke.

"Yudrain was my name."

"I had thought it seemed like some sort of title. Whoever gave it to you chose well."

"Do you think so?"

Even those well-versed in Gore had to consult their books to understand the complicated grammar involved. Clearly, a lot of effort had gone into this. "The name seems as if it was given more thought than even the one I gave to Nathan. Wouldn't you say it's a good name?"

At this point, neither the name Nathan Zuckerman nor Yudrain could be credited solely to him. Instead of answering, Yuder let out a long sigh.

"To be honest, I never fully understood the meaning of that name. But I think the meaning you've shared is probably correct."

"You mean the one who named you didn't tell you the meaning?"

"He might have, but... I really don't know."

He hoped that Kishiar wouldn't detect the emotion hidden beneath his parched voice.

"Well, it's better to know than not, I suppose."

Kishiar didn't ask who had given Yuder the name or why Yuder didn't know its meaning. Instead, he gently pressed his lips to Yuder's hand and cheek again, as if encouraging him to say more.

"Though you may already suspect, the diary of the first Duke Tain that Enon wished to read was something I wanted to know about first. The moment I heard the section you read yesterday, it felt like it might be connected to questions I had, which is why I discussed it with him."

"'If we can find out where the cursed ones come from, perhaps time that doesn't flow in reverse could also be on our side.'"

Kishiar recited the section he had read before.

"You mean the ambitious research goal of finding out where the monsters come from?"

"That's part of it, but it's mainly about the reference to time."

While Yuder hesitated about how to articulate his thoughts, Kishiar muttered something as he gently stroked the back of Yuder's head.

"To me, it looked like just one of many historically interesting concepts, but if it means more to my assistant, there must be a reason. If it's too difficult to say, you don't have to. Is there anything else I should do besides giving that to Enon tomorrow?"

"...No."

"That's a shame."

As he spoke, Kishiar again brushed his lips past Yuder's ear, leaving a light kiss. A small laugh escaped Kishiar's lips as Yuder's grip tightened on his clothing. The hand stroking Yuder's hair became softer, more tender.

This sensation prompted a new thought, a new impulse in Yuder.

"Do you think, Commander, that time could ever be on someone's side?"

"While there are plenty of sayings about time favoring the patient, that's probably not what the diary meant. Taking it at face value... I don't think it's possible. If it were, countless mages would have already bent time to their will."

His answer was reasonable and within expected parameters.

No one in history had successfully manipulated time with magic. Not even the Archmage Luma. Time was impartial to all, and everything in existence went through rises and falls before dissipating into the wind. No matter how powerful or influential, no one could escape this absolute rule.

Yet, for Yuder, time had indeed flowed backward.

What would Kishiar think when he eventually arrived at that conclusion? What would his expression be, what words would he speak? Though Yuder couldn't know now, he hoped that he would still be by Kishiar's side when that time came.

To continue in the same vein as before would not suffice. To ensure that Kishiar's long patience had not been in vain, Yuder too needed to strive to find tangible proof of the truth, worthy of the faith bestowed upon him.

As Yuder's thoughts began to diverge from what they had been, becoming something a bit different and more far-reaching, another voice broke his reverie.

"...However, I'm not so sure about the present era."

Almost involuntarily, he looked up, his eyes meeting Kishiar's deep red gaze, which softened tenderly.

"Isn't this the time when the age of mages wanes and the age of the Awakeners rises? Much like a thousand years ago, when it was openly said that the era of priests was fading and the age of mages was dawning."

This was new information. When Yuder blinked in surprise, Kishiar explained the source.

"It was written in that diary. Just like back then, anything could happen in this era, so think carefully about what I said today."

"..."

"The responsibility of pondering and judging lies with the listener, not the one who has spoken. I'll think it through and come up with my own conclusions. Then, it will be your job to tell me whether I'm right or wrong."

Smiling as if to ask, 'Is this good enough?' the man changed the overwhelming sense of impending rupture, which had been a blend of Kishiar's unique scent and the solidity enveloping him, into different emotions entirely.

Yuder could no longer resist the urge to be closer to the being in front of him. Wrapping his arms around Kishiar's neck, their lips met again. Just before Yuder could slump off his chair, Kishiar caught him and stood, making further conversation impossible.